Is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client?

[massage_toronto]

I've always had this fantasy of becoming a regular with someone and eventually we both develop feelings for each other. And eventually she wants to be my girlfriend. Not for my money, but for who I am and of course our sexual intimacy

I like talking and getting to know someone, even if I know it's just a pure client-provider relationship

Overtime I learned that providers are just normal people who can gain feelings for others. Especially if there is alot of intimacy other than just sex

In your experience, is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client? And I'm not talking about a celebrity client or anything. Just a regular guy

 

[massman]

I've always had this fantasy of becoming a regular with someone and eventually we both develop feelings for each other. And eventually she wants to be my girlfriend. Not for my money, but for who I am and of course our sexual intimacy

I like talking and getting to know someone, even if I know it's just a pure client-provider relationship

Overtime I learned that providers are just normal people who can gain feelings for others. Especially if there is alot of intimacy other than just sex

In your experience, is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client? And I'm not talking about a celebrity client or anything. Just a regular guy

Of course it is “possible”, but exceedingly unlikely and a quite foolish to try to look for or to make happen. You should look for a GF elsewhere. This is her work, her livelihood. She’s not out there escorting in the hopes of finding her Prince Charming.

 

[lir2016]

You created a burner for this?

 

[seanzo]

Is it possible? Sure, anything is possible. Is it probable? No. If you're looking for love you are not doing yourself any favours by looking for it with escorts

 

[massage_toronto]

You created a burner for this?

No, it's my first time on this website

 

[massage_toronto]

Is it possible? Sure, anything is possible. Is it probable? No. If you're looking for love you are not doing yourself any favours by looking for it with escorts

Do escorts tend to find it hard to develop feelings? Or do they judge clients?

 

[massage_toronto]

Of course it is “possible”, but exceedingly unlikely and a quite foolish to try to look for or to make happen. You should look for a GF elsewhere. This is her work, her livelihood. She’s not out there escorting in the hopes of finding her Prince Charming.

I've heard somewhere that escorts don't have many options since most people wouldn't want to date a former escort. They can of course always lie about their past. However I was wondering if they would prefer a man who is a client since he may not judge her, and might accept her fully. Thus she sees him as a potential BF?

 

[Whiterhino]

I've always had this fantasy of becoming a regular with someone and eventually we both develop feelings for each other. And eventually she wants to be my girlfriend. Not for my money, but for who I am and of course our sexual intimacy

I like talking and getting to know someone, even if I know it's just a pure client-provider relationship

Overtime I learned that providers are just normal people who can gain feelings for others. Especially if there is alot of intimacy other than just sex

In your experience, is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client? And I'm not talking about a celebrity client or anything. Just a regular guy

It’s possible and you don’t want it lol trust me.

 

[seanzo]

Do escorts tend to find it hard to develop feelings? Or do they judge clients?

Not an escort so I wouldn't know but I can tell you from my experience they are more interested in your money than they are your affection. I've had a few regulars over the years that I've been rather close to, they confided personal info with me like their real names and phone number, details about their lives, etc but at the end of the day I'm there to get laid and they were there to get paid. Like I said if you are looking for a girlfriend you are wasting your time doing it with escorts

 

[massage_toronto]

It’s possible and you don’t want it lol trust me.

What are the pros and cons in your opinion?

 

[massage_toronto]

Not an escort so I wouldn't know but I can tell you from my experience they are more interested in your money than they are your affection. I've had a few regulars over the years that I've been rather close to, they confided personal info with me like their real names and phone number, details about their lives, etc but at the end of the day I'm there to get laid and they were there to get paid. Like I said if you are looking for a girlfriend you are wasting your time doing it with escorts

Ah I see. Thank you. Are they materialistic and don't see clients as people or they simply don't want to mix business and love?

 

[The Options Menu]

Of course it is “possible”, but exceedingly unlikely and a quite foolish to try to look for or to make happen. You should look for a GF elsewhere. This is her work, her livelihood. She’s not out there escorting in the hopes of finding her Prince Charming.

Even IF it does you're typically far better off to mentally view it as part of the experience, or to move on. If maintaing the view that it's part of the experience becomes awkward or difficult, then move on.

At this point in my life I'd probably be able to handle dating (a presumably former, given my age,) sex worker, though it wouldn't be one I had paid for time. Or a sugar baby.

Are they materialistic and don't see clients as people

Like everyone else most just want to do their damn job in most cases. Part of that job typically involves making a client feel desirable.

 

[Whiterhino]

What are the pros and cons in your opinion?

My experience:

Pros:
- Sex
- Free stuff: The girls I've dealt with were always buying me gifts and food

Cons:
- Some sort of mental illness (most of the time severe)
- Hate men
- Everything is transactional even if its your attention (their currency if you get past not paying)
- Trauma dumping (childhood/ex bf trauma)
- Substance abuse (if drugs/alcohol weren't actively used, they were used heavily in the past and they're paying for it presently)
- Clinginess - Could be a pro for some lol (girls did not have many friends (one had no friends at all), not even in the industry because there were conflict between other SPs (It can get very nasty between some girls)
- They're super lonely. (This profession is lonely).

Again, this is my experience. You also gotta remind yourself that when you're seeing a SW, you're only getting a version of them. They're in character. Keep it professional and don't kill the fantasy for yourself. And bro don't ever bring up seeing her outside of work, if she wants to she'll bring it up herself. If they're not pursuing you, don't even bother.

 

[massage_toronto]

My experience:

Pros:
- Sex
- Free stuff: The girls I've dealt with were always buying me gifts and food

Cons:
- Some sort of mental illness (most of the time severe)
- Hate men
- Everything is transactional even if its your attention (their currency if you get past not paying)
- Trauma dumping (childhood/ex bf trauma)
- Substance abuse (if drugs/alcohol weren't actively used, they were used heavily in the past and they're paying for it presently)
- Clinginess - Could be a pro for some lol (girls did not have many friends (one had no friends at all), not even in the industry because there were conflict between other SPs (It can get very nasty between some girls)
- They're super lonely. (This profession is lonely).

Again, this is my experience. You also gotta remind yourself that when you're seeing a SW, you're only getting a version of them. They're in character. Keep it professional and don't kill the fantasy for yourself. And bro don't ever bring up seeing her outside of work, if she wants to she'll bring it up herself. If they're not pursuing you, don't even bother.

Thank you for this

I don't want free money but I never knew it's possible for women to buy men gifts and food. I thought it felt unnatural to them biologically

And yeah I don't like dealing with women who hate men. It's such an unfair and dehumanizing mindset

So I have 4 questions:

1. Why do they hate men?

2. What's the level of hatred - is it like wanting to hurt us and cause us hardship in life or is it just not liking us?

3. Any way to tell if an escort does not hate men?

4. Could you elaborate more on the lonely part?

Thank you

 

[Canadiandude]

I've always had this fantasy of becoming a regular with someone and eventually we both develop feelings for each other. And eventually she wants to be my girlfriend. Not for my money, but for who I am and of course our sexual intimacy

I like talking and getting to know someone, even if I know it's just a pure client-provider relationship

Overtime I learned that providers are just normal people who can gain feelings for others. Especially if there is alot of intimacy other than just sex

In your experience, is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client? And I'm not talking about a celebrity client or anything. Just a regular guy

Why would that be your fantasy.. your clearly looking for love and a girlfriend I doubt your going to find it through escorts. Their here to make money it’s just a job to them and your just another client. Same as you being another patient to your dentist and doctor etc. Besides pretty sure most of them have boyfriends or are married and have kids. I met plenty that are in relationships but never asked if their partner knows about their work as it’s none of my business. If your looking for a girlfriend better chance finding it elsewhere like at a bar or any social setting, at the gym or join dating sites like hinge and tinder.

 

[Jenesis]

Holy judgments and assumptions Batman!!!!!! LMAO

 

[Whiterhino]

Thank you for this

I don't want free money but I never knew it's possible for women to buy men gifts and food. I thought it felt unnatural to them biologically

And yeah I don't like dealing with women who hate men. It's such an unfair and dehumanizing mindset

So I have 4 questions:

1. Why do they hate men?

2. What's the level of hatred - is it like wanting to hurt us and cause us hardship in life or is it just not liking us?

3. Any way to tell if an escort does not hate men?

4. Could you elaborate more on the lonely part?

Thank you

Women will simp for you if you really like you. That's not unnatural.

1. Idk, I'm going to assume because they're exposed to the worst kind of men in this industry. Time wasters, boundary pushers, body shamers, guys who cheat on their partners, etc.

2. I can't really say, it varies.

3. Ask them. Lol.

4. - I've been told it's difficult dating overall.
- You can't really speak to anyone about your job without judgement, and if you do only a few would understand.
- Past relationships would say they're fine with it but change their mind.
- Competition between other providers. Jealousy etc.

Again my experience.

 

[Ahri]

Of course it is , likely probably not… - I remember commenting on a previous thread about dating SPs and how a friend of mine who is in the business fell in love with her client and they shortly started dating afterwards.

Unfortunately it didn’t end well as the boyfriend wanted her to quit escorting and work a normal job. In short she left him because she didn’t want to leave the freedom of escorting

Moral of the story if a SP falls for you don’t expect her to change her whole life around for you and certainly don’t expect her to quit her job lol

 

[Y_Diner]

Yeah for sure! Go for it OP!

 

[The Options Menu]

@massage_toronto
Sex workers see men from all walks of life, including men that wouldn't otherwise have sexual contact. Often for good reasons that go beyond looks or a simple lack of experience. Also, some men are inclined to treat sex workers as a disposable vessels for their wish fulfilment, without the least bit of understanding, empathy, or even really seeing a provider as a fellow human being. Then there are the guys that are cheating on partners, wanting all of the services, with zero fucks given. It's not surprising that many sex workers end up having a dim view of men.

As far as sex workers feeling lonely goes. Urban living is often isolating. Modern living is also isolating. Working in a job with a stigma attached is isolating. Needing to maintain boundaries with clients is isolating. It being difficult to establish relationships with your peers is isolating. Having other women who find out what you do cast a wary gaze your way is isolating. It shouldn't be surprising that many sex workers are lonely to some degree or another.

Though, as a client, it's not your role to try to fill that loneliness (if it exists at all for a given provider).