Most embarrassing moments during hobbying?
- Thread starter Paprika
- Start date
For those who do a daily nasal rinse, you may know where this is going….
I rinse my nasal cavity daily. It is not uncommon for excess saline solution to remain trapped until you are bent over and turned your head to the side. Unfortunately, this can be some random event many hours later.
I was at the massage parlour and coming to the end of the session. I was about to spray all over the woman’s breasts. I must have had my head down and turned to the side. Right before spraying my semen, I dropped about 100 ml of saline solution on her breasts that ran out of my nose. There was that moment of complete shock from both of us and then the intended explosion.
It was embarrassing when trying to explain what had happened.
I rinse my nasal cavity daily. It is not uncommon for excess saline solution to remain trapped until you are bent over and turned your head to the side. Unfortunately, this can be some random event many hours later.
I was at the massage parlour and coming to the end of the session. I was about to spray all over the woman’s breasts. I must have had my head down and turned to the side. Right before spraying my semen, I dropped about 100 ml of saline solution on her breasts that ran out of my nose. There was that moment of complete shock from both of us and then the intended explosion.
It was embarrassing when trying to explain what had happened.
My buddy burst a hemorrhoid during a session. Blood everywhere on the bed and towels.
He wins.
Actually, nobody won that day except for the housekeeping staff he left a $100 for.
He wins.
Actually, nobody won that day except for the housekeeping staff he left a $100 for.
Some of you have legendary experiences! I don't have anything in that category. One of the agencies downtown has an incall location in a building that has the same name, but with different number. They're all in the same block. I ended up in the wrong building and went to the room and knocked. I asked the booker if this was the right entrance being beside XYZ store and the booker was like "IDK. I'm not even in Toronto" lol. I found the place eventually was about 3-4 minutes late. But it was super embarrassing explaining to the provider I went to the wrong place.
Mine are mostly pretty generic:
-couldn’t get hard a few times (usually multiple visits on a single day but once was just completely baffling)
-came in like 3ish minutes. Wish I could blame the amazing BJ that proceeded the 3 minutes of sex but I was just over excited.
-once finished up and left an incall only to receive a call from the owner of the agency. The SP couldn’t find the money I gave her. I described the envelope and all was sorted.
-multiple times I’ve had women straight up fart in my face during DATY. I think it’s hilarious but they are mortified.
-2nd escort I ever saw got me so flustered with her huge tits, sexy bodysuit and the fact I was going to fuck her bbl that I put my clothes back on after the shower and she teased me (she knew I was nervous / excited and it was good teasing).
-couldn’t get hard a few times (usually multiple visits on a single day but once was just completely baffling)
-came in like 3ish minutes. Wish I could blame the amazing BJ that proceeded the 3 minutes of sex but I was just over excited.
-once finished up and left an incall only to receive a call from the owner of the agency. The SP couldn’t find the money I gave her. I described the envelope and all was sorted.
-multiple times I’ve had women straight up fart in my face during DATY. I think it’s hilarious but they are mortified.
-2nd escort I ever saw got me so flustered with her huge tits, sexy bodysuit and the fact I was going to fuck her bbl that I put my clothes back on after the shower and she teased me (she knew I was nervous / excited and it was good teasing).
Was thinking in a similar direction ! Wow my "embarrassments" are absolute nothings compared to the stories here
Nothing crazy embarassing except the only time I had trouble getting hard was at an orgy and I was so overstimulated by all the craziness around me that even though I'm getting blown by someone who's getting fucked from behind I can't get it up. *sad trombone* I changed positions and partners and got it going and then finished back with the woman I started with so it was all good in the end.
Waaaay back, probably 50 years; came down from CFB Borden for a weekend, buddy and I picked up a skanky street walker type somewhere around Dundas and Jarvis (?), around 1am. Her and I are going at it in the back of my station wagon, Finished the deed, and then realised buddy had turned the dome light on so that he could watch. And so could the 500 winos who were peering through the windows.
Not being able to find the room in the hotel. It was at what is now the Delta by the airport. The room numbers just JUMPED past the number I was given. I was starting to sweat finally she called me and gave me directions, the halls were a bit of a maze and this room was off down a little alcove. All good in session though
Going to the lobby instead of the room is basically the equivalent of not going in the dressing room at hockey GOOD CALL
I was doing bj and it had been a long day. Client requested heels. I went to get into the 69 position and had a terrible spasm and then weakness and couldnt lift my my leg all the way in the middle of swinging it over his head. I kicked him in the face 
he was super nice about and was always sweet when we bumped into each other in public.
Another time a client requested I spit on his face and let it dribble down his face. He stuck his tongue out and licked it off his lip and I started dry heaving. I couldnt stop for like 5 minutes. I couldnt do it again and watch it go down his face.
My dog was notorious for digging in the garbage and eating condoms. I ended up having to buy all steel containers with lids and a foot pedal. One day im walking my dog and a kid goes "ma'am theres a balloon sticking out of your dog's butt". I had to pull out an undigested condom straight out of his butt with a bag and I called the vet. Turns out its a none issue unless it turns in a way that it collects poop and causes a blockage. Thankfully that never happened.
I used to have this really weird guy follow me around the town I lived in expecting me to just hop in his car. I never did. Im not and never have been a street walker. When that didnt work he would follow me around stores and ask me if I wanted to smoke crack. ALL THE TIME. Even when I was with my kids. Everytime I saw this guy he'd come up to me while I was shopping and minding my own business and ask me if i wanted to smoke crack. I'd often be with my kids and this guy would park near the park and watch me. It was strange. Its just funny to me because the only thing he had to offer me was crack. I dont smoke crack. Ive never smoked crack. I dont do drugs but this person was 100% convinced i would follow him with the promise of some crappy drugs. Id always come home and say "wtf, do i look like a crackhead?" I was so angry that he kept offering me crack like I was some drug addict and he wouldnt take no for an answer, ever.
When he died I was so relieved.
Looking back, Frank Ocean had a song called crack rock that accidentally played on a Playlist I had never used before when he was a client. I was embarrassed and explained to him that I was sorry and I dont do drugs and it was a silly thing to make a song about and I moved on. The guy was never right after that. I think he created this whole idea about me based on a pre-made playlist I accidentally clicked on. He would downright harass me to do crack with him because I accidentally played a song about crack
Frank Ocean is a really good artist and his music is beautiful but the song is strange.
he was super nice about and was always sweet when we bumped into each other in public.Another time a client requested I spit on his face and let it dribble down his face. He stuck his tongue out and licked it off his lip and I started dry heaving. I couldnt stop for like 5 minutes. I couldnt do it again and watch it go down his face.
My dog was notorious for digging in the garbage and eating condoms. I ended up having to buy all steel containers with lids and a foot pedal. One day im walking my dog and a kid goes "ma'am theres a balloon sticking out of your dog's butt". I had to pull out an undigested condom straight out of his butt with a bag and I called the vet. Turns out its a none issue unless it turns in a way that it collects poop and causes a blockage. Thankfully that never happened.
I used to have this really weird guy follow me around the town I lived in expecting me to just hop in his car. I never did. Im not and never have been a street walker. When that didnt work he would follow me around stores and ask me if I wanted to smoke crack. ALL THE TIME. Even when I was with my kids. Everytime I saw this guy he'd come up to me while I was shopping and minding my own business and ask me if i wanted to smoke crack. I'd often be with my kids and this guy would park near the park and watch me. It was strange. Its just funny to me because the only thing he had to offer me was crack. I dont smoke crack. Ive never smoked crack. I dont do drugs but this person was 100% convinced i would follow him with the promise of some crappy drugs. Id always come home and say "wtf, do i look like a crackhead?" I was so angry that he kept offering me crack like I was some drug addict and he wouldnt take no for an answer, ever.
When he died I was so relieved.
Looking back, Frank Ocean had a song called crack rock that accidentally played on a Playlist I had never used before when he was a client. I was embarrassed and explained to him that I was sorry and I dont do drugs and it was a silly thing to make a song about and I moved on. The guy was never right after that. I think he created this whole idea about me based on a pre-made playlist I accidentally clicked on. He would downright harass me to do crack with him because I accidentally played a song about crack
Frank Ocean is a really good artist and his music is beautiful but the song is strange.
Was really enjoying myself and I wasn't paying attention. I accidentally drooled into her eye. sigh....
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To me it’s not embarrassing the shock! To make a long story short I was with the provider out near the airport area many years ago we ended up going to the bed and pulled the duvet cover off, and the power of white sheets. There it was in Plainview I think the pilots were using it as a beacon yes you guessed it a big brown skidmark! About 10 inches long and a faint whiff of shipped. I just told her go back into the open area I’ll sit down and have a blow job instead money well wasted. The other one a redhead need me right in the nuts, direct hit no deflection whatsoever, I just told her I’m not paying extra for that we had a good laugh and accident.
More than 20 years ago I had booked a very well reviewed provider. She was hosting in a nice condo near Yonge and Sheppard. I was inexperienced and very nervous. I got there quite a bit early. She had given me the apartment number and the buzzer code. Once I got to the building, someone was coming out so I sneaked in without buzzing. I know, I know. I was a bit paranoid and I thought it would be more discreet. I know, I was an idiot. When I knocked on her door, there was a bit of commotion and she took a look through the peephole. She told me to go away as she was not ready. She was clearly freaking out. She texted me to cancel the appointment and told me not to do that again. She then came on TERB to describe this freak who had come to her door while she was not done saying goodbye to the previous date. She was understandably very upset. I ended up fessing up on the forum explaining that it was an honest and stupid rookie mistake and that I felt terrible, but that I was not a creep. In any case, things got cleared up but I never saw her. Lesson learned...
