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Smart ol' boy An old farmer in Georgia had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer...

7 Reasons Not to Mess with a Child A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a...

" 'Tis better to be silent and appear a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

New LA Drivers Exam New LA Drivers Exam For those of you who are not "fortunate" enough to live in California, here is a copy of the California Driver's Exam, and for those of you who do, study real hard. This is a new exam. Since driving conditions (and culture) are unique in Los Angeles, you...

As I've Matured... I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets. I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses. I've learned that it...

Marketing for Dummies People have asked for an explanation of Marketing. Perhaps the following analogies will help clear it up: You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Direct Marketing. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a...

Talk Like a Pirate Day - II Top Ten Pickup Lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day (We came up with these in an effort to interest The Other Dave (Letterman) in TLAPD. His staff liked 'em, but alas, his show is "dark" the week of Sept. 19.) 10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know...

Talk Like a Pirate Day - I Talk Like a Pirate Day The Basics Ahoy! - "Hello!" Avast! - Stop and give attention. It can be used in a sense of surprise, "Whoa! Get a load of that!" which today makes it more of a "Check it out" or "No way!" or "Get off!" Aye! - "Why yes, I agree most heartily...

Female vs. Male 1. NAMES If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 2. EATING OUT...

You can't outsmart a woman A man calls home to his wife and says, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing at a big lake with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so would you please pack me...

A blonde woman enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman: "I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen". The surprised salesman replies: "But, ma'am, computers do not need curtains!!!” And the blonde said: "Helloooo.... I've got Windows!”

In the past, I have stayed at the Holiday Inn Select in Kanata. It is near Hwy 417, exit 140, about 20 minutes west of downtown Ottawa. The hotel has nice rooms, and is located near the Corel Centre. The number there is (613) 271-3057.

Another opinion: 1. GFE - and I don't mean "does everything." I mean "will act like a girlfriend: seems genuinely glad to see me, wants to have a good time together (not me alone, not her alone), wants to kiss and cuddle, no rush, etc." Sometimes, we have exchanged 'rules of engagement' so...

TBD = www.bigdoggie.net Electroguy

If you do ot wish to consider illegality or immorality, then consider this: you have guaranteed yourself the inability to continue to be a hobbyist. As soon as the SPs (or MPs) find out who you are, not one of them will want to see you - they know now that you cannot be trusted - you might...