Advice please.

[Vanessa Valentine]

Hi everyone!

I have found myself in a difficult situation and I'd like to ask for some advice to clear up the matter without causing either party anymore unnecessary stress.

I recently went to another city on tour. I pre-arranged a rendezvous with a gentleman and I asked him for a deposit to guarentee our appointment. He is a bit younger (no offence to younger guys, but in my experience they are less reliable) and I didnt want to waste my time travelling to see him and blocking out 2 hours of my evening to be stiffed.

I used a friends paypal account for him to transfer the deposit. This was actually a large sum of money.

I ended up being stranded in the country that evening and I called the gentleman to ask if he'd mind me being an hour late. He said that wouldn't work. I was leaving the next day at noon.

I went home and kept in touch with him. I offered to see him on my next trip for an extra hour and take him out for dinner (my treat), to somewhat make up for the disappointment and stress from his money being transfered and the delay in it's return. He thought my offer was great and he agreed.

I have asked my "friend" to deposit the funds back into the clients account as I hadnt provided the service to him. My "friend" replied by saying it was difficult to get the money back b/c he's already taken it out of the account and couldnt put it back in because apparently with paypal you receive a bank card to withdraw money from the paypal account, but cannot make deposits. He told me to inform my client that, if he couldnt wait (and I dont blame him) he could contact his bank or paypal directly and reverse the charges.

I've been in touch with the client periodically since the misunderstanding and with each email- he's become more frustrated and slightly threatening. I can fully understand his frustrations and I feel terrible to be the cause of it.

I've explained to him that I am a reputable provider. I have a large presence on this board and many people who know me personally here on Terb that can vouch for me and my sincerity, etc. I would NEVER rip anyone off and I will clarify this matter. It's been about one month since this all took place.

My question is- since the begininng, I've recommended him calling his bank to reverse the charges. This is legal and stressless as he has no receipt of services rendered through the account, etc. Also, my "friend" cant and wont dispute his reversal of the charge.
It's pretty simple.

Anyhow, what should I do??? Advice please and Thank you!!!

V.

 

[Big Yellow]

Just have your friend send the money back to his paypal account. I believe you have a 4 day grace period where you can request your money back.

In regards to the card you get to withdrawl funds, yes you can take out money with that card just like an interact card, but you can also register a bank account on your paypal account where you can directly deposit the cash into that account.

 

[Nibbler]

Good idea Winston.

Vanessa the main reason the problem arose is that you had a third person in the mix when you really didn't need them.

It would be best for you to arrange return of his money ASAP and then have your friend reimburse you instead of involving the clients bank and Paypal.

You may want to get your own paypal setup for future dealings, that is if you think you'll continue to require deposits. I'm certainly not saying that deposits are a bad way of doing things because how else do you guarantee that the client is going to follow-thru with the appointment. There is a need for deposits, it just depends on the individual situation.

Best to remedy the issue with the client first and make sure he is happy.

 

[Vanessa Valentine]

Thank you guys- I appreciate the advice. I'm going to send him a money order tomorrow morning and I'll be setting up a paypal account too.

V.

 

[xarir]

As others have noted, PayPal may give out your real name & address. Be careful.

To get this guy refunded, you can courier him a bank draft. The draft will cost you a little bit ($5 or so) but it's certified money and your name doesn't have to appear on the draft either. The guy can just deposit the draft in a machine so his privacy is protected as well.

 

[Vanessa Valentine]

As others have noted, PayPal may give out your real name & address. Be careful.

To get this guy refunded, you can courier him a bank draft. The draft will cost you a little bit ($5 or so) but it's certified money and your name doesn't have to appear on the draft either. The guy can just deposit the draft in a machine so his privacy is protected as well.

That sounds like a perfect idea- thank you!!!

 

[WhaWhaWha]

True. If I had been the client, I would have flipped six ways to Sunday after a month. In fact I never book where advance payment is required. As unreliable as some youg men are, your reputation is at stake here. Imagine the damage your client could have caused you in cancelled bookings from then til now had he disclosed your little problem on this board. A little trust in collecting at the door next time may cost you because of a scammer or two down the road, but it will pay off dividends in the long run because most of us are decent fellows.

 

[Vanessa Valentine]

True. If I had been the client, I would have flipped six ways to Sunday after a month. In fact I never book where advance payment is required. As unreliable as some youg men are, your reputation is at stake here. Imagine the damage your client could have caused you in cancelled bookings from then til now had he disclosed your little problem on this board. A little trust in collecting at the door next time may cost you because of a scammer or two down the road, but it will pay off dividends in the long run because most of us are decent fellows.

You're totally right. Believe me, I feel terrible. I can appreciate
and understand his frustration. This is my first time doing something like this and it is clearly not for me.

Anyhow- everything will be cleared up tomorrow and I'll feel much better. Thanks again for all the advice!

V.

 

[tboy]

There is also western union, you could wire him the money and you provide wu with some sort of proof (like his dl number) so he can pick up the money. I don't believe you have to reveal your name on the money transfer but I could be wrong.

If he's in Canada, a money order is also an easy way to send money and you fill it whatever "sender" information you want and its guaranteed money. Unfortunately its very difficult to cancel or reverse if there's any problem.

If your client has a paypal account just have your friend deposit money into it from his account then give your friend the money (if you've received it). If you haven't received the funds from your friend it sounds like your friend is jerking you around.

I've done many transactions with Paypal and never received any payee information except for the company name (which you determine when you sign up). This can even be your email address.

With paypal you can make purchases or makes sales with the same account. You can either spend money from it or have funds transferred into it. I once overpaid and it was no problem getting money deposited or refunded back into my account. Just register it with a credit card.

I am assuming you have an address to send him the bank draft? If you do you could also courier him travellers cheques (signed twice) a cashier's cheque, money order, cash, when couriering cash just insure it for the same amount as the funds enclosed in case anything happens to the delivery.

 

[wazzup]

how'd it go?

I just jumped on this thread late. I'm curious how you made out on this matter Vanessa? If you did a bank draft I'd think the guy would have been hesitant to give out personal info.

Either way, you are to be commended for trying to make the situation right, as soon as possible.