Always sad to see someone embarrass themselves accidentally. But this guy... "butterflies in my tummy?", "I do my hair like 10 times?" He's just laying in the street asking to be run over.
There was an old punk rock band (the Angelic Upstarts) who had a falling-out with their drummer, Stick. They managed to get their hands on a copy of his diary, wherein he had written similar drivel, and used the most embarassing excerpts for a lyrics on a single called "Stick's Diary" they released at the height of their popularity (they were a top-40 band in England at the time).