Funny First Experiences

[EntrepreneurGuy]

My first escort experience “what type of a girl are you looking for?” … LOL

Over half a decade ago … after months and years of wondering how to find ladies in this universes oldest profession, suddenly it dawned on me, I turned to that book of all books – the yellow pages. Grabbing the 10lb Los Angeles phone book, I started to thumb through. I stumbled across the “escorts” listings and studied each advertisement for the quality, wording and presentation that would fulfill my dreams.

Well, after days of ad analysis, a few drinks of courage and speech roll-playing, I dialled. A guy answered … after a huge pause, my “speech preparation” didn’t involve a guy answering … so I hung up. I was definitely treading on new ground here. Returning to my faithful yellow pages, I called the next perfect number and re-jigged my speech. Oops! Same guy answered … not prepared for that situation either. Confused, I hung up again. Needing more courage I went out, had a drink … returned to dial a third number. This time I threw out all logic.

Ah great – a different voice. This time … third time a charm … I managed to bumble my way through. He asked me to describe the type of girl I was looking for … I was not prepared for that question anymore than the others … so he offered suggestions – blonde, brunette, redhead … petite, tall, etc.

I mumbled my first thoughts: “petite lady with long blonde hair”. Before I finished, my new found friend interrupted me and said … I’ve got the perfect lady, “Barbie” will be there in 30 minutes. As I hung up, this is easy I thought – just like ordering pizza.

Here I was visiting California, imagining a beautiful Baywatch Barbie like blond, blue-eyes with a smile that can bring peace to the Middle East. Then the knock on the door. What did I find on the other side: a round asian lady, late 30’s, wearing a blonde long wig in sandals.

To this day, I imagine her reaching into her stash of wigs in the backseat of her car preparing in minutes for her next date – whatever the request – redhead, brunette, blonde, long, short, etc. – we'll be there in 30 minutes.

… LOL

Other funny first experiences????

 

[katetoronto]

Your story made me smile. My first 'client' was with an ex NHL player. I was a bit tipsy, he was drunk, but we had a great time! Nothing funny to share about it, unfortunately!

 

[baltimoron]

Yeah, I've read a lot on TER about rip-offs in LA. Either you pay $300 for B&S, or $1000 for a washed up porn star with a long list of rules. If it's B&S, send the girl away, ask for another, or call someone else. However, LA does have some awesome SCs like Bare Elegance which I'd like to visit again.

Fortunately, when I started pooning (also half decade ago), TBD and TER had been online for awhile, so I was able to find reputable agencies in my area. So from online boards, I learned beforehand that what you should never do as a hobbyist is let your fingers do the walking (in the yellow pages, that is ).

As for funny stories, well, once an SP in Niagara cleaned up after an overflowed toilet. Another time, I booked a dinner date with an SP, but when we got back to the hotel, I had to take a real bad dump, so that postponed "dessert" by about a half hour.

I always have this nightmare about farting during climax, though.

 

[goodtime]

My first escort experience “what type of a girl are you looking for?” … LOL

Over half a decade ago … after months and years of wondering how to find ladies in this universes oldest profession, suddenly it dawned on me, I turned to that book of all books – the yellow pages. Grabbing the 10lb Los Angeles phone book, I started to thumb through. I stumbled across the “escorts” listings and studied each advertisement for the quality, wording and presentation that would fulfill my dreams.

...
Here I was visiting California, imagining a beautiful Baywatch Barbie like blond, blue-eyes with a smile that can bring peace to the Middle East. Then the knock on the door. What did I find on the other side: a round asian lady, late 30’s, wearing a blonde long wig in sandals.

To this day, I imagine her reaching into her stash of wigs in the backseat of her car preparing in minutes for her next date – whatever the request – redhead, brunette, blonde, long, short, etc. – we'll be there in 30 minutes.

… LOL

Heard similiar stories about Vegas and Indiana. The exact opposite, my friend have the hots for Asian girls. They end up getting white girl in Suzie Wong outfit & wig to play the Asian part. When asked what's Asian about them, girls responded, they watched Suzie Wong goes... or Rush Hour 2.

 

[Kommander1975]

Aaaah the fist time.... I actually had it good, grabbed "Eye" magazine, called, went to this downtown apartment and was met by a cute, hot-looking blonde. Had a somewhat good time but there was an older lady there that kept knocking on the door every 10 mins and telling the girl to come out, had to wait like 3 mins before she came back to me.

 

[WhaWhaWha]

Other funny first experiences????

I remember working for an agency in California that was short staffed. I answered the phones for them. In fact we had one girl on staff who we just kept recommending to different clientelle. Well she was booked to the limit, so when the next guy called and could barely stammer out his request. I recommended a slim blonde, threw on a wig and sandals and headed over to his place. I called myself babrie. He was clearly hammered and never detected little wha...

 

[hambone]

.... He was clearly hammered and never detected little wha...

Has anyone??? LOL