The kids grew up & I'm a mess!

[milehigh]

I am super close to my kids - they grew up as much best friends with me as well as being kids. Well my youngest is now 19, and will probably be moving to the West Coast. I support him, because it is what I'd do, and I may end up there in a few years. He knew that.

I never thought it would have such an effect on me. I'm not depressed - just a bit of stunned I guess.

I may be just as stunned that after bringing them up so many years, that game is finally over.

I know everything will turn out for the best. A number of my friends went out there, and my All time fav SP went out there. I had planned to end up there in five years.

I've sort of remedied the situation by taking a trip out there soon. And I know I can go out time to time. I love it out there.

Call me a girl if you want - but does life ever sneak up on you!

 

[mrsCALoki]

Silly question maybe, but why not move out there now?

 

[milehigh]

Will take a huge financial hit if I go before 5 years. Figured out what stuns me...... Fuck... does life ever go by fast!

 

[Phil C. McNasty]

Its called "empty nest syndrome": http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empty_nest_syndrome

http://www.google.ca/search?as_q="e...243,d.aWc&fp=56ec88f8ee35ef0c&biw=853&bih=529

 

[frankcastle]

It's tough but at least you have a good relationship.

 

[onthebottom]

I have one away at University and one at home (12), I could believe it when the oldest turned 10 much less went away... My kids are 9years apart and I'm feeling lucky it worked out that way.

If your kids made the transition from teens to adults and your still close you've won, enjoy the victory.

 

[oil&gas]

Get a young wife (or a young mistress if your adult kids' mom is still
with you) to procreate a few more kids and bring them up. With more life
experience behind you should be able to face your second nest-emptying
experience with aplomb.

 

[rgkv]

I remember...it never goes away, now from out west comes a call about the GREAT grandson :faint:


Mannnnnn do I feel old.........

 

[TeasePlease]

I have one away at University and one at home (12), I could believe it when the oldest turned 10 much less went away... My kids are 9years apart and I'm feeling lucky it worked out that way.

If your kids made the transition from teens to adults and your still close you've won, enjoy the victory.

I was just thinking that....I can understanding why the OP is sad, but it sounds like a parental victory to me! Be proud.

 

[red]

I am super close to my kids - they grew up as much best friends with me as well as being kids. Well my youngest is now 19, and will probably be moving to the West Coast. I support him, because it is what I'd do, and I may end up there in a few years. He knew that.

I never thought it would have such an effect on me. I'm not depressed - just a bit of stunned I guess.

I may be just as stunned that after bringing them up so many years, that game is finally over.

I know everything will turn out for the best. A number of my friends went out there, and my All time fav SP went out there. I had planned to end up there in five years.

I've sort of remedied the situation by taking a trip out there soon. And I know I can go out time to time. I love it out there.

Call me a girl if you want - but does life ever sneak up on you!

time has a way of doing that.

keep in touch with your son. fly him back or fly out to spend time with him for vacations. its important and will help ease the pain. focus on the good things and how well he is doing.

 

[Big Sleazy]

I know the exact feeling. My only daughter is now two years in University. It seems like only yesterday that I held her in my arms when she was born. Life is way too short.

BS

 

[S.C. Joe]

Have more kids, that what some folks do. Some even adopt

 

[richaceg]

Be happy of what your kids have accomplished and be proud of that. It's some sort of accomplishment as a parent. I play with my kids all the time and they enjoy being with me but deep inside I know someday when they reach adolescence...that relationship is going to change. They will go with their peers...and that's what kids do. As parents, we need to support them and make sure they hang with the right people. And make sure what they need (not what they want) is provided.

 

[bazokajoe]

Girl

 

[Ridgeman08]

You're not a girl dude... you're just a real good dad!

I'm dreading that part of my life soon too... I have 3 teenagers, (one's in post secondary, a second next year, the third is 2 years away...) I've been saving for their education since birth, so that part of it is pretty much covered... but more and more these days, I find myself with too much free time. Unless they need a ride somewhere or need money for something, I'm pretty much an after thought! LoL.

Summertime is easy... I have lots of summertime activities... winter? Not so much.

 

[VIPhunter]

Real good dad's know that while their job never technically over, the bulk of the work is to raise well adjusted people who can move into a new stage of life, with gusto and confidence.

Your children will go though this process and when they get married/settle down will agin seek your council and companionship.

This is a great time to consider investing in a vacation property somewhere. You can all arrange your schedule to meet for a big family get together 2 or thee times a year.

Enjoy the fruits of your labour, you've earned it.

 

[richaceg]

Real good dad's know that while their job never technically over, the bulk of the work is to raise well adjusted people who can move into a new stage of life, with gusto and confidence.

Your children will go though this process and when they get married/settle down will agin seek your council and companionship.

This is a great time to consider investing in a vacation property somewhere. You can all arrange your schedule to meet for a big family get together 2 or thee times a year.

Enjoy the fruits of your labour, you've earned it.

+1...while kids are young, invest your time and make them enjoy the outdoors...fishing, kayaking...then buy yourself a nice cottage...waterfront. guess who'll be crashing in every time bass season opens.

 

[VIPhunter]

+1...while kids are young, invest your time and make them enjoy the outdoors...fishing, kayaking...then buy yourself a nice cottage...waterfront. guess who'll be crashing in every time bass season opens.

I mean this with respect: I think there are a large group of overly invested parents ( at the expense of their marriage or career or friends) who are going to be mightily depressed and alone when the kids spread their wings.

The new parent seems to be encouraged to be friend first..... I think it's a mistake.

 

[simon482]

i hate that my kids are growing up. my little girl is gonna be 11 in a month. wtf is that about.

 

[VIPhunter]

I hear what you are saying but it is fact that many parents love their kids way more than their spouse and if the kids did not exist there would be no marriage. I have no problem prioritizing kids over a career either. I see way too many people overinvest in there career mistakenly believing what they do is important only to see those illusions shattered in a restructuring or a recession and suddenly they have no job and their identity is kaput and they realize their worpkace only "cared" about them until they didn't any more. Meanwhile, for 10 years kids have been asking "where is dad/mom....?"

I suppose it's crazy to suggest this on an Escort Review site, but the best possible thing for kids is a strong permanent and priority of the husband wife relationship.

Everything else flow from that. Spouses are not perfect, but neither are children.

One's career is not one's job. Jobs come and go, but a career is fulfilling because you are always looking ahead.

We succeed in raising children, when they leave the nest, no?