Top Ten most Polite Ways to Say Your Zipper Is Down...

[Perry Mason]

...by David Letterman

10. The cucumber has left the salad.

9. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells.

8. You need to bring your tray table to the upright and locked position.

7. Paging Mr. Johnson... Paging Mr. Johnson..

6. Elvis is leaving the building.

5. The Buick is not all the way in the garage.

4. Our next guest is someone who needs no introduction.

3. You've got a security breach at Los Pantalones.

2. Men may be From Mars.....but I can see something that rhymes with Venus.


And the #1 way to tell someone his zipper is unzipped.....

1. I always knew you were crazy, but now I can see your nuts.

Perry

 

[flyingdgn]

I was standing in the subway during rush hour where there was a beautiful girl sitting in front of me. I was very surprised that she was smiling at me the whole time.

Found out when I got home that my fly was open and I just happened to be wearing a very colourful pair of glow in the dark Joe Boxers.

 

[MuffinMuncher]

1. Your barn door is open.

 

[phelan]

I was standing in the subway during rush hour where there was a beautiful girl sitting in front of me. I was very surprised that she was smiling at me the whole time.

Found out when I got home that my fly was open and I just happened to be wearing a very colourful pair of glow in the dark Joe Boxers.

dude you should have introduced yourself homie

 

[backflush]

You have a wardrobe malfunction.

 

[Cashanova]

Hey buddy, this is a family place, put the mouse back in the house.

/Gunther

 

[Diode]

You are advertising!

 

[Cinema Face]

Your zipper's set to Monica not Hillary.

 

[james t kirk]

1. Your barn door is open.

My personal fav

 

[flyingdgn]

"I can see your dick and I'm not impressed."

I like the straight forward approach.

If not, "Your pet worm is trying to escape" will do.

 

[Shades]

Once, when someone tried to tell Winston Churchill that his fly was open, his retort was...."Have you ever seen a dead bird fall out of a nest?"

 

[diva631]

It's too bad i didn't know of these the other night. Went to the casino with a friend, i won't mention any names of course....but as we got out of the van he said Shit i forgot my wallet at home. Then as we were walking threw the parking lot he hollers.....SHIT!! My damn fly is open!!!!!!!! .....lmao.....and here he was, in a full parking lot yanking on his zipper!! If you hollered in it tho all you'd get was an echo!





I'm A weenie and I don't care!





Ben you dumbass stop editing my post!!! It's not like i told anyone that it was you!!!!

 

[Jade4u]

The one that I remember is "You're flying low"

 

[matrix2004]

Snake is trying to bust out of prison.

 

[LanceMcClure]

My personal favourite on my sig line:

"The cage is open....but the beast is asleep"

-ummmm that would be in the flaccid state of course


Also another favourite:

"Release the hounds!"