another little Johnny joke

[Incall]

The teacher asked the class to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. '
>
> The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating' .
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> Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.'
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> The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate'
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> Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.
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> She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him.
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> Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight.'
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> The teacher sat down and cried.

 

[Cycleguy007]

I know its a repost, but

I thought a visual aid may enhance the experience!

 

[iprint]

Miss Brown was teaching her class the alphabet.
"Sally think of a word that starts with c and use it in a sentence"
Sally _ " cat" " My cat is brown and black"
" Very good Sally," said Miss Brown " Tim , your letter is t"
Tim -"My brothers names are Tom and Tony, we all start with T"
"Excellent Tim, who's next" said Miss Brown, out of the corner of her eye she see little Johnny waving, she been burned by him before, she thinks and thinks of a letter. " Johnny your letter is U"
Johnny - "Urinate!!"
"JOHNNY"
"What Miss it's a word."
"O.K. use it in a sentence"
" Miss Ur an eight, if you had bigger tits you'd be a ten!"

 

[Cinema Face]

I love Johnny jokes.

The teacher was giving a lession on the difference between poetry and prose. She says, prose is like poetry except that it doesn't rhyme.

For example if I said, 'Mary had a little lamb, its fleese was white as snow, and everywhere that Mary went, the lamb went with her.' that's an example of prose.

She asks for an example of either poetry or prose and Johnny's hand goes up. As usual, the teacher is reluctant to ask Johnny but nobody else has their hand up. So she asks Johnny.

Johnny says, "Mary had a little pig, a onry little runt,
he stuck his nose up Mary's clothes and smelled her little..."

Then Johnny askes the teacher, "do you want an example of poetry or prose?"

She says nervously, "Prose. Please prose."

Johnny says, "OK. ...asshole!"

 

[DonTrafficante]

another johnny joke

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question. "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left ?"
"None.",replied Johnny. "'cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nevously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking."

 

[RayFinkel]

The teacher asks her students to go thru the alphabet and for each letter to say a word.

First comes Susie. She says “A for Apple”

The teacher is quite pleased. Next is Tommy’s turn. “B is ball”

“Very good, Tommy” says the teacher.

As they go through the alphabet, poor little Johnny is never picked and he’s going out of his mind, but the teacher knows better.

They get to the letter R and Johnny is still putting up his hand. The teacher thinks for a moment and can’t come up with anything bad that starts with the letter R.

So she finally picks Johnny.

Johnny stands up and says “R is rats. Big fucking rats with cocks this long!”

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question. "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left ?"
"None.",replied Johnny. "'cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are thinking."
Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nevously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you are thinking."