Audi = Cunt. Cars by cunts for cunts.

[FatOne]

Something is wrong with this picture. The car in the ad (new A6 Avant station wagon) is not available in Canada. Agree the ad is annoying. Some creative director's dream that doesn't adequately sell the car in my view.

I've been hitting the "mute" button a lot more since that commericial started airing. It just blares. Fucking annoying, but if it raises awareness and sells cars not such a bad thing for Audi.

It is funny, there was someone at the house, about 40 years older [almost 80] and female. We were both talking about the commercial in the kitchen when it came on in the other room. Neither of us had a clue what the commercial was about. I don't mean what car, but even the product. It was on for a while but not a clue, so I looked over to catch the last few seconds to see what it was. Was talking to the male parental unit a few days later, completely forgot about which car the commercial was for again.

It might raise awareness but not for any particular product, as it gets shoved in the end.


Even if you do raise awareness, and even if you do it in a non annoying way, it doesn't mean it will sell. I recall reading that those old spice commercials dispite all the buzz and being rather good, didn't actually do nothing for sales.

 

[FatOne]

That being said, I don't actually have anything against the Audi as a car, I still have not a clue about which Audi is being advertized in the commercial.
I just would like to be able to watch TV with having my ears assaulted.
It's not that I want them dead, I just want them to not be alive anymore

Said the fat cunt.

I am not a fat cunt, I am a fat bastard, there is a difference. For one thing, I am dead sexy.

 

[Madeline Rhodes]

That fucking commercial is driving me nuts. Was watching the CTV news channel and every fucking commercial break it is on.
That song is like nails on chalkboard
Everyone at Audi should get cancer and die.

That being said, I don't actually have anything against the Audi as a car, I still have not a clue about which Audi is being advertized in the commercial.
I just would like to be able to watch TV with having my ears assaulted.
It's not that I want them dead, I just want them to not be alive anymore

I am not a fat cunt, I am a fat bastard, there is a difference. For one thing, I am dead sexy.

Look... I get that you are annoyed with the commercial. Let me give you a hint. Remote... CH+ button... CHANGE THE CHANNEL!

As for the BS comment about them getting cancer and dying. You need to F OFF! Clearly you've never had a scare or lost someone to it. Not at all amusing. Maybe I am a touch over sensitive RIGHT NOW and hopefully the mods won't spank me too much for alluding to cussing... But FFS! This was offensive!

Now if you'll excuse me I will go back to what I was doing and avoid this thread.

*highly agitated and offended*
Maddie

 

[wet_suit_one]

For the record, BMW's are for cunts. Audi's are kinda lame but definitely not cunty. That's purely BMW's purview...

Also, I fucking hate TV. Mainly because I have an unnatural hatred of commercials. I DESPISE THEM (except the sexy ones which we don't show in North America) with a vengeance.

 

[FatOne]

Clearly you've never had a scare or lost someone to it.

My mother would disagree with you. You can dig her up and ask her about it if you want.

If you think the world revolves around you and your personal issues, you might want to avoid Andrew Dice Clay's "Dice Rules" where...(including a lengthy joke about an XXX movie that is essentially a bunch of racial stereotypes and repeated orgasmic cries of "Ya should get CANCER, ya piece of shit!")

Ah comedic gold. A fellow fan even made reference to the you should get canca [as Dice says it] soon after the maternal units death. Classic good for a larf.

 

[Major Major]

Look... I get that you are annoyed with the commercial. Let me give you a hint. Remote... CH+ button... CHANGE THE CHANNEL!

As for the BS comment about them getting cancer and dying. You need to F OFF! Clearly you've never had a scare or lost someone to it. Not at all amusing. Maybe I am a touch over sensitive RIGHT NOW and hopefully the mods won't spank me too much for alluding to cussing... But FFS! This was offensive!

Now if you'll excuse me I will go back to what I was doing and avoid this thread.

*highly agitated and offended*
Maddie

Oy vey...

Another oversensitive person with hurt feelings that feels they need to stick their nose in a discussion that isnt necessarily aimed at them just to dump on people.....

Heres a q for you maddie..... if this thread annoys you..... why hang around to read it and post in it?

 

[Madeline Rhodes]

My mother would disagree with you. You can dig her up and ask her about it if you want.

If you think the world revolves around you and your personal issues, you might want to avoid Andrew Dice Clay's "Dice Rules" where...(including a lengthy joke about an XXX movie that is essentially a bunch of racial stereotypes and repeated orgasmic cries of "Ya should get CANCER, ya piece of shit!")

Ah comedic gold. A fellow fan even made reference to the you should get canca [as Dice says it] soon after the maternal units death. Classic good for a larf.

No I don't think it revolves around me.

I think that what you said wasn't a joke. A joke I can take. Wishing that everyone at Audi should get cancer and die is not a joke. It is absolutely over the line.

You want to joke... Plenty of jokes.

What do you call a person who has a compulsion to get lymphoma over and over again? . . .

A lymphomaniac.

Flying to Survive Cancer

On board a flight to Hawaii, the pilot announced, "That thump you heard was our last engine conking out. I'm really sorry to tell you this, but we are going to crash into the ocean."

In the stunned silence that followed, an angry voice spoke out. "Dammit! That stupid doctor of mine! He said I was going to die of cancer."

"He lied!"

The Comeback

After being diagnosed with lung cancer, my husband and I went to his hometown for a family reunion trip that had been planned for several months. All the family knew I had been diagnosed and was scheduled to have surgery upon my return home. They all tended to avoid the subject, but took much more time hugging me than usual.

While we were eating supper one night, my mother-in-law commented on how well I was eating. I told her that it was only natural, now that I was eating for two . . . me and my fast growing tumor.

Hormone Side Effects

In 1996, at age 47, I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. The urologist to whom I was referred by my new doctor recommended several months of Lupron followed by a radical prostatectomy, which I knew (from searching the internet) was the correct protocol at the time. In conference with my wife and I, however, the urologist warned that several months of Lupron to shrink the tumor might result in side effects, including hot flashes. He mentioned that, in rare cases, breast growth sometimes results.

On hearing that estrogen would take over as testosterone faded from my system, my wife's first question to the doctor was, "Will he finally enjoy shopping with me at the mall?"

Putting Chemo Nausea to Work

A young lady with breast cancer decided to keep it a secret from her workmates.

During chemotherapy she continued going to work even though she was frequently nauseated. Her boss, a nurturing woman, called her into the office and said, "Lately you are frequently sick in the mornings. Tell me truthfully, are you pregnant?"

Putting a Positive Spin on Cancer

You can be very courageous in stopping a crime. What have you got to lose?

Alternate Version

If you see an old person all crippled with arthritis, you can feel very superior. You won't have to grow old that way.

Alternate Version

You will win your bet with your life insurance company. They wanted you to keep paying to a ripe old age, but you will beat them at their game when they pay up.

Alternate Version

If you have advanced lung cancer, you can adopt a holier-than-thou attitude. Accost all the smokers you know and tell them to stop before they die of lung cancer.

You say: "John, you'd better stop smoking or you'll get lung cancer just like I did."

John says: "Mind you own business, Bill. Go away and die and let me enjoy my cigarettes."

Alternate Version

If you are a man with prostate or testicular cancer, you can say it was due to your energetic and creative sex life. You can die as a macho hero.

Alternate Version

If you want to revenge yourself on a mean boss, start a lawsuit that claims your cancer was caused by stress on the job. The smear will stick--especially if you die before it goes to court. Then you can die with a smile on your face.

Depression Expression

One woman was so depressed with the return of her breast cancer that she forgot to feed the cat until it ate her canary.

Alternate Version

Prozac is a cure for cancer depression. You'll feel good about everything. Take enough of it and you'll think that getting cancer is even better than winning the state lottery.

Alternate Version

I forgot my depression over cancer when I discovered that the ticket I had flushed down the toilet was the lottery winner.

Alternate Version

When I heard I had cancer, I looked so depressed that a homeless person gave me a dollar.

Alternate Version

I am a widower. I was depressed over getting cancer and the death of my wife — but that was nothing compared to having to eat my own cooking.

Alternate Version

Cancer is a depressing thought. So is paying the medical bills. That's enough bad news for anyone. But pity the lady whose cat shredded the draperies while she was in the hospital.

Alternate Version

Can a cat with cancer be overcome by depression? Not as long as there's a pit bull in the same house.

Alternate Version

Mice are used to test out cancer treatments. Why? Because the cats have a conspiracy to run things their way. This explains why mice get depressed.

Alternate Version

Take it from my dog, "Mangler," cats can't be trusted. It's depressing to think that on top of cancer, you need to worry about your cat's loyalty too.

Alternate Version

Cancer depression is what my friend got when the doc said he wouldn't live to see the end of the World Series. He had bet $10,000 on it and his team was in the lead.

Alternate Version

Cancer depression is like waiting for a car to conk out when the needle is on empty.

Alternate Version

Cancer depression is worse when there is only one piece of toilet paper left. Life's not fair.

Alternate Version

What would whip me right out of my cancer depression is to be wearing open sandals when I step on fresh dog poop.

Alternate Version

Depression over cancer can be replaced by euphoria when one takes the Prozac anti-depressant. You'll think you can fly. So be especially wary if someone asks you to go Bungee jumping.

NOW THAT'S SOME FUNNY SHIT!

 

[Madeline Rhodes]

Oy vey...

Another oversensitive person with hurt feelings that feels they need to stick their nose in a discussion that isnt necessarily aimed at them just to dump on people.....

Heres a q for you maddie..... if this thread annoys you..... why hang around to read it and post in it?

I'm allowed to be over sensitive... I have ovaries. That is prerequisite isn't it?

Maybe I just needed to be bitchy? Oh wait... the ovaries entitle me to that too!

God I LOVE being a woman!

 

[e3boy]

I am a long time Audi owner and I think that ad sucks. hopefully it was dreamed up by some ad agency goofs not Audi engineers.

On the question of how they look, it depends on the model and its performance. There are some good looking cars in both lines, but I think that those BMW convertibles look like they are built for a barbie doll.

My S5 is a very masculine car and gets a lot of praise. The R8 is many people's dream car, and I think the Q7, particularly the diesel is a great SUV and is bigger than either the BMWs or MBs in the same class.

Audi also has a great racing heritage, far better than BMW, which to me still is a bit of a yuppie or "dink" car. Audi has done well at all the races it has committed to. They changed rallying forever, they dominated touring car series all over the world forcing FIA to ban the quattro drive, they did amazing things in circuit racing and when they turned their mind to it they dominated Le Mans, including winning it with a diesel vehicle.

No disagreement, Audi has a great racing heritage.
Yes the S5 is a very good looking car. Supermodel beautiful. Like Cindy Crawford beautiful.

But Audis are girls and BMWs are boys.
Audis in general are round and soft edged while BMWs are chiseled and hard edged.

Face it, Audis have cunts driving them, BMWs have cocks driving them.
The joke is what's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW. BMWs have the pricks inside.
btw yes I drive a BMW.

So are Porsches. The 911 would be more a female shape rather than a sculpted male shape.
That's what the designers intended though, to emulate a beautiful woman's body.
Nothing wrong with that, my dream car is the new Porsche 911 – 991.

 

[asterwald]

No disagreement, Audi has a great racing heritage.
Yes the S5 is a very good looking car. Supermodel beautiful. Like Cindy Crawford beautiful.

But Audis are girls and BMWs are boys.
Audis in general are round and soft edged while BMWs are chiseled and hard edged.

Face it, Audis have cunts driving them, BMWs have cocks driving them.
The joke is what's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW. BMWs have the pricks inside.
btw yes I drive a BMW.

So are Porsches. The 911 would be more a female shape rather than a sculpted male shape.
That's what the designers intended though, to emulate a beautiful woman's body.
Nothing wrong with that, my dream car is the new Porsche 911 – 991.

Actually all cars are getting more curvier. Compare todays BMW with the ones from 1980's. Its called aerodynamics.

 

[afterhours]

No disagreement, Audi has a great racing heritage.
Yes the S5 is a very good looking car. Supermodel beautiful. Like Cindy Crawford beautiful.

But Audis are girls and BMWs are boys.
Audis in general are round and soft edged while BMWs are chiseled and hard edged.

Face it, Audis have cunts driving them, BMWs have cocks driving them.
The joke is what's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW. BMWs have the pricks inside.
btw yes I drive a BMW.

So are Porsches. The 911 would be more a female shape rather than a sculpted male shape.
That's what the designers intended though, to emulate a beautiful woman's body.
Nothing wrong with that, my dream car is the new Porsche 911 – 991.

what gender is panamera?

 

[rafterman]

Yeah I don't mind the commercial myself but also find that by repetition it has become tiresome. They must run it several times an hour on BNN.

 

[e3boy]

Actually all cars are getting more curvier. Compare todays BMW with the ones from 1980's. Its called aerodynamics.

Yes since the 1980s cars have lowered the drag coefficient.

I know it's subtle and subjective but in general when you look at comparable models and years:

Handsome car (hard edge and aggressive):

 

[e3boy]

Pretty car (sleek and streamlined):

 

[e3boy]

what gender is panamera?

female, but that thing is one whale of an ugly female.

 

[asterwald]

what gender is panamera?

must be female. Looks pregnant.

 

[asterwald]

I'm allowed to be over sensitive... I have ovaries. That is prerequisite isn't it?

Maybe I just needed to be bitchy? Oh wait... the ovaries entitle me to that too!

God I LOVE being a woman!

Are you unhappy with your gender?

 

[Madeline Rhodes]

Are you unhappy with your gender?

Depends on the day... You boys get all the fun. Peeing when standing up... Giving facials (oh wait some women can do that)... And you guys do not get called over sensitive if you point out that a comment is out of line.

 

[Doot]

 

[mmouse]

Yes, audis are for cunts.
And the ultimate asshole car is the chrysler 300.