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cheating

plymaker

The G spot finder
Jan 16, 2004
283
1
18
toronto
Guilty about what. Its in every Mans nature to cheat if he has not not he will and if he has he will con't to see how long it will last
 

seven

Banned
Apr 16, 2003
420
0
0
hiding behind my computer screen.
I don't think you can quite say that plymaker. If every married man cheated (continually as you say), the sex industry couldn't handle the demand and prices would skyrocket. If you think about it, there are probably at most a thousand Sex Workers (SP's or MPA's) in toronto and at least two hundred thousand married men. We aren't even considering single men and foreign demand. I think I can make the claim that for most married guys if they are going to cheat they would do it with a SW. Every SW would have to service over 200 guys a year (and more than once.) The stats and your statement don't add up.

Probably less than a third of married men cheat on any kind of regular basis.
 

train

New member
Jul 29, 2002
6,989
0
0
Above 7
seven said:

I think I can make the claim that for most married guys if they are going to cheat they would do it with a SW.
Really?


Not even the remotest possibility for me .

I think your thousand sex workers is low . I would classify mpa's and maybe even dancers as sex workers too .
 

Cobster

New member
Apr 29, 2002
10,420
0
0
for $5,000. hmmm ;)
 

EnergizerBunny

rhythmic member
Blah blah blah ... here I go again ... hehehe

seven said:
I don't think you can quite say that plymaker. If every married man cheated (continually as you say), the sex industry couldn't handle the demand and prices would skyrocket.

Probably less than a third of married men cheat on any kind of regular basis.
I don't think you can quite say that Seven. :p Most men DO NOT cheat with SPs! Most cheat with non SPs. Why are we talking about cheating on a regular basis? After all cheating is cheating; it only takes once and you are a cheat. hehehe According to the latest statistics if I remember right something like 35% of Canadians have cheated, and get this 50% of Americans have cheated. In the UK I think that study said 40-45% cheated. Most cheating is probably done in the American Bible belt, with their neighbor or their wife's sister. Hahaha. Oh yeah and the study said that Canadians are the most kinky. "One time at band camp ... "

Believe the study or not. But I agree, Men will be Men, so blame god for creating them that way. And women are becoming more so, I guess as the balance of equality becomes more evened out.

Let's not even get started on the subject of whether humans are inherently monogamous.

Feeling guilty is a useless emotion, originally instilled in us as a means of control. If you do not like what you have done, don't do it again and forget about it. No use crying over spilt milk. It is non-productive to carry negativity in any form.
 

Fay

naughty lady of the night
Jan 19, 2004
156
0
0
if it was up yer arse, you'd know.
tee-hee!

Oh, women do it too, we just work harder to hide it better!
 

james t kirk

Well-known member
Aug 17, 2001
24,056
4,033
113
Never been married, but i have cheated on girl friends yes.

Did I feel guilty?

Yeah, a bit, but usually they drove me to it.

My first serious GF in university, I never cheated on. I loved her more than life. Never even cheated in the most remote of ways. Nothing. But then she broke my heart, and to be honest, ever since then, I have not held women in as high esteem as I used to. If we had never broken up, I doubt I would have EVER cheated on her (hypothetical I know.)

My next serious GF I cheated on at the end of our relationship (ironically with the woman above). Would I do it again? In a heart beat.

My GF that I lived with for 5 years, I cheated on. With MP's, and a few casual sex partners, including the love of my life listed above (a pattern??). Did I regret it?? No, not really. It was interesting because at the start of the relationship with my live in ex (we were not living together at the time), she was transfered to Ottawa by work. She could have stay'd in Toronto, but elected to further her career by moving to Ottawa, and tried to persue a LD relationship with me. I frankly lost interest because she showed me exactly where I stood, so I met another woman who I fell for in a way, but she was not quite available. Meanwhile, I kept seeing my GF in Ottawa but grew more and more distant. In November of that year, I had a weekend with my GF from Univestity and yes, we slept together. Did i feel guilty cheating on my GF in Ottawa? No, not for a minute. My shit luck, the one here in Toronto was not available (for a myriad of reasons) and the ex GF from University was living in the States. Ironically, she (the live-in ex) ended up getting fired from her job in Ottawa, she came back to Toronto, and we started picking up the pieces, ended up living together and even buying a house together before we finally split up for good. And yes, I continued to cheat on her. The dye was cast.

Timing is everything in life.

Would I cheat on my wife if I was married???

Maybe, to Probably. It would depend. I would like to think that I could be monogamous, but I dunno anymore. (Is an MP cheating??)

But I would try to keep it at arms length. I doubt I would ever want to be carrying on a LOVE affair with a GF on the side.

Most of my married friends cheat. Some are stupid and are involved in love affairs, others pick up women through the internet, or bars, or SP's keeping it sexual.

I don't judge anymore.
 

taylortime

RetiredMostly
Nov 26, 2002
228
0
0
www.geocities.com
I wonder how many more or less people (M+W) would see SPs if their spouse was ok with it.....removing the "cheating" aspect and simply making it "enjoying some erotic time".... as we now enjoy "Gym work out time" and "reading time" and "golfing Time" ...etc..?
Taylor
 

Guy Lafleuer

New member
Jan 16, 2004
175
0
0
Yes I did and yes I felt guilty about it.

After that I only utilized SP's.

I still felt guilty but less so. Usually to the point that I would come home after and treat her like a queen ( make dinner, massage, prolonged oral etc... )

Guy
 

doubledown

who said 'surrender'?
Aug 20, 2003
863
0
0
tdot
What's cheating? Is it going to strip clubs and getting lap dances? Is it paying an sp or mpa for her services?

Or, is it spending time with another person, not sexual, but having dinner, doing something together, in other words, having an emotional relationship?
 

EnergizerBunny

rhythmic member
doubledown said:
What's cheating? Is it going to strip clubs and getting lap dances? Is it paying an sp or mpa for her services?

Or, is it spending time with another person, not sexual, but having dinner, doing something together, in other words, having an emotional relationship?
It is whatever your partner thinks it is! :D A buddy of mine gets in real shit if the girl at the Tim Horton's window smiles and is friendly with him. Another buddy is ok as long as he comes home to sleep at night at least a few times a week and pays the bills.

The theory of relativity. Not only in Einstein's world!
 

shredder

Born To Shred
Nov 20, 2003
314
0
0
location, location
www.burton.com
seven said:
I think I can make the claim that for most married guys if they are going to cheat they would do it with a SW.
I think this comment leads to probably a bigger question. We`ve had recent threads asking about what constitutes a sexual act and how do you define a sexual partner, and i think the same clarification is needed here. IMO there are emotional and physical aspects to cheating and if you look at the recent thread Advice and Perspective I believe that hobbyists would tend to differentiate the physical act of sex with an SP dirfferently from having a romantic affair with a co-worker or some other acquaintance that involved some emotional bond. I classify both as cheating, but they represent a different mindset for the one who is cheating and does not preclude the possibility that someone becomes emotional attached to their SP.

I may just be trying to rationalize my own infidelity, but the guilt I feel for my encounters with SPs would be considerably different and probably far less than the guilt I would feel if I were to be romantically involved or worse, loved someone other than my spouse...not something I have experienced or even considered.

I don`t think most men (and I don`t know why we are only talking about men who cheat) look to SPs to cheat but to address a need and if they are looking to cheat because of their dissatisfaction with their spousal relationship they are probably looking for someone who can provide a deeper emotional bond on the other side. Having worked in an office environment for a major corpoation with thousands of employees, the cheating is most probably with co-workers or someone from their social circle.
 

seven

Banned
Apr 16, 2003
420
0
0
hiding behind my computer screen.
Re: Blah blah blah ... here I go again ... hehehe

EnergizerBunny said:
Most men DO NOT cheat with SPs! Most cheat with non SPs.
I don't think so. If you are married it is just asking for trouble to have an affair, and besides SW's are usually way hotter than girls in your normal dating range and it takes significantly less time and trouble to get laid. Besides I know you're married, and you go to MPA's (which I included in my SW definition), so I'm not sure why you would think most other married men would be any different in their approach to cheating.

Why are we talking about cheating on a regular basis?
Because plymaker made the claim that all married men "con't" to cheat (i.e. do it on a regular basis.)

After all cheating is cheating; it only takes once and you are a cheat.
That's a pretty big rationalization. I have stolen before, so now according to you I am a thief, so I might as well continue to do it b/c continuing to do so doesn't make any moral difference to who I am as a person, right? If you stop cheating or stealing, then you are no longer a cheat or a thief. That makes all the difference in the world.

Believe the study or not. But I agree, Men will be Men, so blame god for creating them that way. And women are becoming more so, I guess as the balance of equality becomes more evened out.
I don't think men have to cheat. Some men don't care enough about their wives not to cheat. If you think about it, under most circumstances you are basically breaking a promise of commitment to her and lying continually to her face in order to cheat. How much can you really care about her if you place sex above her like that? I'm gonna get killed for making that statement but if you really want to get down to the crux of it, that statement holds in spite of the rationalizations and self-serving biases to the contrary.
 

The Doctor

Still Without Humour
Jun 2, 2003
2,318
1
0
1060 West Addision
taylortime said:
I wonder how many more or less people (M+W) would see SPs if their spouse was ok with it.....removing the "cheating" aspect and simply making it "enjoying some erotic time".... as we now enjoy "Gym work out time" and "reading time" and "golfing Time" ...etc..?
Taylor
I like the way you think Taylor. Will you marry me? :D
 

james t kirk

Well-known member
Aug 17, 2001
24,056
4,033
113
Re: Blah blah blah ... here I go again ... hehehe

EnergizerBunny said:
Men will be Men, so blame god for creating them that way.
Men get to have way more fun than women, it's just hard wired into us.

How many women out there would PAY for a guy to tie them up, spank them, dildo fuck them up the ass, call them names, then pee all over them.

None.

But men, thousands in this city alone.
 

DenWa

El Duderino
Mar 20, 2003
1,164
0
0
Running Amok
plymaker said:
Guilty about what. Its in every Mans nature to cheat if he has not not he will and if he has he will con't to see how long it will last
This is, was, and always will be the most bullshit justification for being unfaithful that has ever existed.

Do what you want - everyone has their own comfort level of what they think is ok...but gimme a fucking break.

DW
 

EnergizerBunny

rhythmic member
Re: Re: Blah blah blah ... here I go again ... hehehe

seven said:
If you are married it is just asking for trouble to have an affair, and besides SW's are usually way hotter than girls in your normal dating range and it takes significantly less time and trouble to get laid.

I don't think men have to cheat.
That is too thoughtful. Most cheating, I believe, happens as a course of events. One thing leads to another ...

Situation, timing, and opportunity.

seven said:
Besides I know you're married, and you go to MPA's (which I included in my SW definition), so I'm not sure why you would think most other married men would be any different in their approach to cheating.

If you stop cheating or stealing, then you are no longer a cheat or a thief. That makes all the difference in the world.
Interesting. :D You sound just like my other little friend. "Say hello to my little friend!".

seven said:
That's a pretty big rationalization. I have stolen before, so now according to you I am a thief, so I might as well continue to do it b/c continuing to do so doesn't make any moral difference to who I am as a person, right? If you stop cheating or stealing, then you are no longer a cheat or a thief. That makes all the difference in the world.

...but if you really want to get down to the crux of it, that statement holds in spite of the rationalizations and self-serving biases to the contrary.
We are all self-serving and we all rationalize. Again the whole relativity thing. So you think that all the guys out there who have cheated but don't anymore should go to their special someone and say: "Hey baby I'm an not a cheat! I did cheat on you, but I stopped." And she will say "ok baby no big deal you are not a cheat" ??? You will ALWAYS be guilty of it even if you should not "feel" guilty. hehehe If you feel regret or that you should not do it then DON'T DO IT. However, you will always be guilty of having done something (cheat, steal, love, hate, sleep, eat), but it is only relevant if "someone" (including yourself) cares, or attaches meaning/relavence to it.

seven said:
Some men don't care enough about their wives not to cheat. ... How much can you really care about her if you place sex above her like that?
It could be also argued that cheating saves a sexless marriage, and if no one is the wiser, hey it is a good thing. Kids have a home life, etc ... How much does she care about him if she lets him walk around with a loaded gun? Sometimes relationships are bigger and involve more than sex. It ALL depends on how people want to see it. Hey you are gonna see it the way you want to. And good for you, you have to live in the world you create, just as we have to live in the world we create.

I know you and your little friend like to attach the importance of Shangri-la to sex in a relationship. But to some people it is just fucking, relieving an urge.
 

seven

Banned
Apr 16, 2003
420
0
0
hiding behind my computer screen.
Re: Re: Re: Blah blah blah ... here I go again ... hehehe

EnergizerBunny said:
Interesting. :D You sound just like my other little friend. "Say hello to my little friend!".
LOL. You're whacked.

So you think that all the guys out there who have cheated but don't anymore should go to their special someone and say: "Hey baby I'm an not a cheat! I did cheat on you, but I stopped." And she will say "ok baby no big deal you are not a cheat" ???
Yeah, I think that's exactly what they should do. I'm rolling EB.

I know you and your little friend like to attach the importance of Shangri-la to sex in a relationship. But to some people it is just fucking.
My little friend the musician??
 
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