For the ladies: Do you feel victimized or empowered??

[drlove]

I saw a news story the other day about the bust at Finesse Massage Club in Moncton. It was mentioned that the property itself had been forfeited to the Crown, and will most likely be used as a resource/support center for women who want to leave the 'sex trade' as they put it.

Personally, I think it's good to have something like this in place for those who need it. However, the problem I had with the story was that it had undertones of coercion. That is, it was subtly implied that the women working there were doing so either under duress, or were victims of circumstance. Like most pieces that deal with this topic, it showed the owner being led away, while a police spokesman stated 'it's a good day for justice', or something to the effect that it was another victory against criminal activity.

I don't believe that the story showcased the true nature of the business at all. IMO, the general portrayal of the adult entertainment industry along with all its attendant stigmas is endemic of a backwards way of thinking. Here on Terb for instance I'm assuming that most of the ladies at least somewhat enjoy the job they do, otherwise they wouldn't be here.

Furthermore, isn't this industry the epitomy of feminism?? That is, control over one's own body, freedom of sexual expression, not to mention economic advancement through ownership and control of the means of production and so forth??

Ladies, I would very much like your thoughts on this issue. Do you feel empowered or victimized??

 

[Meister]

It's funny you mention this because last week I got into trouble for suggesting to an SP that she is too pretty to be doing this and that if she wanted to could marry a rich, handsome guy in a heartbeat. She took offence and said she likes what she does.

 

[tboy]

Yeah, I know many that say they like what they do and it shows.....but in all honesty I would be most would choose another profession where they could make $200 +/- an hour.

IMHO it IS the money and circumstances that make most or some go into this biz.....

 

[pixiegyrrl]

There is a differnce between independant escorts.. agency escorts and sweat shop escorts..

Empowered or victimized.. Well do you have a choice? It is in the hands of the SP... If she has to choose this line of work because of financial burdens or addictions.. then she may feel victimized.. If she is being forced into this line of work to pay off a debt or because she is being forced to work.. then..

I chose this line of work instead of working 60-70+ hours a week.. I want to go back to school without decreasing my income.. along with changing my career.. so I feel empowered..

Everyone has their own story..

this comes up again and again.. It is certainly hard to go back to minimum wage when you can earn a day in 1/2 hour..

But my expenses these days are shocking.. who knew running a business would have such a high overhead..

 

[HaywoodJabloemy]

Coincidentally, there was an article today in The Vancouver Sun written by a MPA/escort.
http://thesexparty.ca/Micah-VancouverSunArticle.html

 

[Keebler Elf]

I think a lot of the women that claim to love the business actually love the money, relative freedom, and independence. Not what it is they're actually doing (providing sex). They might not be willing to admit that, but ask them 10 years after having been in the business and you'll get a much more honest answer.

I don't know too many strippers that have been in the business for 10+ years who don't either dislike it or hate it with a passion. But that's all they know and they don't have the skills (or inclination) to get a "real job".

If you look at the porn industry, all the girls say how much they love the sex and the celebrity of being in porn. Ask them 5-10 years later (if that) and most will tell you how much they hated it and/or felt used.

 

[freedom3]

that's right

It's funny you mention this because last week I got into trouble for suggesting to an SP that she is too pretty to be doing this and that if she wanted to could marry a rich, handsome guy in a heartbeat. She took offence and said she likes what she does.

It is interesting that escorts feel that marrying for money is degrading and insulting, but having sex for money is just a job.

 

[Svend]

Everyone has their own story..

This is one reason I find many escorts and dancers so absorbing to talk with, each has a background or circumstance that is interesting and they've dealt with life by making decisions that most would not dare to make. Some are angry and seriously conflicted while others are quite rational and fun loving.
There are some bores but they seem to be fewer than in the general population of women.
You won't hear too many stories of victimization on a forum like this, the ones concerning men are probably even more closeted. There are other places on the internet where expressing these problems wouldn't interfere with your roles here.

 

[langeweile]

Either way it is a tough way to make a living. Unless you are a robot you somehow give a piece away of you everytime.
I have the greatest respect for your choices.

 

[Svend]

If sex is purely recreational with no attachments, you wouldn't feel you are giving a piece of yourself. However, if you can't choose the partner and you are paid money to compensate for this it becomes more difficult if he's unattractive to you.
It often depends on how much money it takes to empower some people.

 

[langeweile]

If sex is purely recreational with no attachments, you wouldn't feel you are giving a piece of yourself. .

t
This is true for men, but less true for women.

Wise man said:

"Man need a place..Women need a reason"..

 

[booboobear]

Freedom3, just a quick question... Are you insinuating that having sex for money is degrading? That is a matter of personal opinion but I don't think a hobbyist could really say that considering he's never been an escort and has never walked in her shoes. Only until you do that can one really state that. JMO...

I think you are right that every escort regards her job a different way , we can't decide how she feels some seem to enjoy their work and that is good for us men because we feel better knowing she is ok with her work.
I don't think because we are men we can't have an opinion however but then again every sp feels differently so it's how she feels with it.

I happen to have a boss that's an a hole and I think it's sometimes degrading to work for him.