How much severance to pay mistress?

[fuji]

wouldn't the amount of "severance" really depend on how she knows and how much that information could bite you in the ass down the road?

I say be generous!

That's one reason why I am happy that it's a paid relationship. If you read up you'll realize I probably had non-paid chances with her too. That would almost certainly have become a mess since an unpaid scenario would have carried obligatory emotional baggage I was able to eject in the paid scenario (eg, I can tell her I have a great marriage and that there's no emotional future in the paid scenario, but in the unpaid I'd have to pretend to care about her and pretend my marriage had problems, and so on).

That it's paid also makes it just as high-risk for her to out the relationship as it is for me.

 

[Chivas Regal]

Now this is an interesting thread!
Fuji, you sound awfully sweet, but when the hand reaches out for money, she is an SP...... Just out of curiousity, how much were you paying her for a weekly get together?

Hi Hon,

Since the last time we spoke, have you found a special friend?
You can email me if you like.

 

[BallzDeep]

I think Chivas Regal and Fuji are actually believing these women are in love with them, when they are just gettin' played. "I think I love you Fuji" oh "and that'll be $800 please"

 

[Meister]

I think Chivas Regal and Fuji are actually believing these women are in love with them, when they are just gettin' played. "I think I love you Fuji" oh "and that'll be $800 please"

Very true. I think fuji would be able to find out very quickly if she is in love if he went on a couple of dates and screws without paying her.

 

[BallzDeep]

The girl mentioned that he was easy to talk to and Mr. Fuji mistook this for true love on her behalf. lol I think when you pay to be with someone for a few hours a week, it may be in that persons best interest to flatter you to reep the financial rewards. I have a hunch this girl would miss the money more than Mr. Fuji!

 

[red]

The girl mentioned that he was easy to talk to and Mr. Fuji mistook this for true love on her behalf. lol I think when you pay to be with someone for a few hours a week, it may be in that persons best interest to flatter you to reep the financial rewards. I have a hunch this girl would miss the money more than Mr. Fuji!

since you don't fuji or the lady in question- your speculations as to the motives and emotions of either party are worthless.

 

[BallzDeep]

She would miss the money more than she would miss Mr. Fuji! (clarify)

 

[BallzDeep]

since you don't fuji or the lady in question- your speculations as to the motives and emotions of either party are worthless.

I just think when you're paying someone to be with you and after every date she's going home with 7-8 brown bills in her purse, when the so called real dates start and there's no more browns in her purse, those feelings will disipate in an awful hurry!

 

[fuji]

I think Chivas Regal and Fuji are actually believing these women are in love with them, when they are just gettin' played. "I think I love you Fuji" oh "and that'll be $800 please"

Ha. Well I hope so. That's what I want. I'd much rather she played me, it's much cleaner that way. I absolutely don't think "I think you're easy to talk to" means anyone is in love with me. I think it's a warning sign. It MIGHT mean they are STARTING to develop inappropriate feelings, so I took some steps to make sure it stopped there. It also might have meant nothing. I just felt, better safe than sorry, so I put a stop to it.

 

[petitelover]

I would take it slow Fuji and let her think not seeing you anymore is her idea - you never know what repercussion's might come out of this. You may think you have information on her that might guard against her contacting your wife but sometimes people act irrationally especially in a relationship. Good luck.

 

[Aardvark154]

I just think when you're paying someone to be with you and after every date she's going home with 7-8 brown bills in her purse, when the so called real dates start and there's no more browns in her purse, those feelings will disipate in an awful hurry!

Emotions and relationships are Complex, I think Chivas Regal points out a very real likelyhood in this kind of relationship.

 

[Ben Hogan]

"It's not you, it's me!"

George Costanza

 

[BallzDeep]

The girls are in love with the arrangement, once it changes, so do the feelings!

 

[Cinema Face]

I’ve never been a believer in the sugar daddy/sugar baby relationship thing. I’ve heard too many stories about them being disasters. The typical sugar relationship seems to start out sweet and then she gets more and more demanding and the sex quality and quantity starts to diminish. The baby gets financially dependant on the daddy. Often she gets involved in alcohol or drugs. The relationship declines until the daddy decides that he’s had enough and leaves. Usually the end is really ugly for both of them. I’ve always thought that guys and gals who get mixed up in this sugar thing are idiots.

Reading the stories of Fuji and Chivas has restored my faith somewhat. I suppose that it can be beneficial if it’s done the right way.

I suppose that it’s possible to have a relationship like in the movie Pretty Woman. I’ve always thought that was a fairy tale.


Fuji, it sounds like you’ve handled this thing well so far and you’ll probably do the right thing. You’ve probably been a really descent guy to your baby and she will probably miss not having you around for both financial and emotional reasons. Therefore, you’re right to give her a “severance” of sorts to soften the blow.

I would think that somewhere between N*2 and N*4 would be appropriate. Also, you should give this girl a warning that it might come to an end soon. Choose your words carefully.

Also, I agree with others on this thread that you should also share the ending of this story with us as well, since you’ve shared this much so far.

Let us know how it ends.

Best of luck buddy,

 

[Chivas Regal]

I think Chivas Regal and Fuji are actually believing these women are in love with them, when they are just gettin' played. "I think I love you Fuji" oh "and that'll be $800 please"

I don't mean to hijack Fuji's thread but I will weigh in with my own experience. First off, my mistress told me to STOP paying her. For her the relationship was soiled by the money factor. That being said, there are other ways to spoil a woman than to slip her cash every time you sleep with her. I have had quite a few such offers over the years, and it is not as uncommon as some people may think.
There are verbal and non-verbal clues as to how a relationship is progressing and being aware of the circumstances and needs of the other person has always worked in my favour. Communication is the key to EVERY successful relationship, wether it be casual or professional. So some people may think that I am full of shit, and that is fine. But a true gentleman is also the one that doesn't kiss and tell....

 

[solitaria]

Your "mistress" will be angry for two reasons none of which have anything to do with you. She will be angry over losing a good source of income that she has grown accustomed to having and because she will feel rejected and used.

It sounds as if you are both confused over the nature of your relationship as john and hooker.

 

[Meister]

She will be angry over losing a good source of income that she has grown accustomed to having and because she will feel rejected and used.

How come guys never feel used in these situations?

 

[solitaria]

I don't mean to hijack Fuji's thread but I will weigh in with my own experience. First off, my mistress told me to STOP paying her. For her the relationship was soiled by the money factor. That being said, there are other ways to spoil a woman than to slip her cash every time you sleep with her. I have had quite a few such offers over the years, and it is not as uncommon as some people may think.
There are verbal and non-verbal clues as to how a relationship is progressing and being aware of the circumstances and needs of the other person has always worked in my favour. Communication is the key to EVERY successful relationship, wether it be casual or professional. So some people may think that I am full of shit, and that is fine. But a true gentleman is also the one that doesn't kiss and tell....

She told you to stop paying her because she thought she could guilt you into giving her more things by making you believe she felt something towards you. Also, the best deal financially for women is marriage (or long-term relationships) not contract fucking and for that to happen there needs to be a progression in the dynamics of the relationship. Women are experts at using guilt and feelings of moral obligation over sex to their full advantage.

 

[solitaria]

How come guys never feel used in these situations?

Because we are too busy feeling guilty.

 

[fuji]

Your "mistress" will be angry for two reasons none of which have anything to do with you. She will be angry over losing a good source of income that she has grown accustomed to having and because she will feel rejected and used.

Nah. You're projecting something of yourself there. She's not gonna be angy. Disappointed at best.

It sounds as if you are both confused over the nature of your relationship as john and hooker.

Hey, I'm the one that set up the paid relationship, although having used a lot of SP's in my time I have to say you're wrong, these situations have a different dynamic. You gotta put some shades of grey into your black and white colouring kit.