Might be worth a quick re-evaluation of the last few 'successful' dates you've had, or any you've needed to cancel prior to the date. SPs don't have terb per se but many share info about bad clients/experiences (not saying this is happening here), esp indies who maybe don't have the safety net/screening potential of an agency. If all your previously-visited companions are still wanting to see you you're probably alright.
Indie unreliability
- Thread starter superman9494
- Start date
Thanks for your response. It definitely sounds like you have the clients best interest in mind. Could you elaborate a bit more on the mental aspect of things? I am curious to know so I can show up better for the girls.
The OP tried multiple 6 hour dates... My initial thinking was that 6 hours is a big commitment. Yes, it's also big money, but that's a lot of time with a person you don't really know. It may just be that the OP simply contacted a number of providers who got cold feet at that duration. He should maybe try a couple of shorter appointments with a provider before he suggests a 6 hour date, but what do I know?
This was my thought. 6-hour dates on the first date are a possible chore. Maybe something better came up???? Not to sound rude, but I don’t know if I will like a client enough to spend 6 hours with them on the first shot.
I'm at the point where I won't even book longer than 2 hours anymore now with anyone and I won't do a max of longer than an hour for a first date.
I'm at the point where I won't even book longer than 2 hours anymore now with anyone and I won't do a max of longer than an hour for a first date.
I will speak for myself but it's multiple things.
The entertainment side - you have to be on your best demeanor always. You leave your emotion at the door even if the clients before was absolutely terrible. You also wear multiple hats that can vary from trauma dumping on you to just being engaging in terms of conversation when the person in front of you is not always a conversationalist and will not reciprocate. You have to be constantly aware of your client body language, level of happiness, desire and as well as providing the right amount of flirting, sex and excitement that he will be compelled to book again. And for some, it's multiple times a day during extended period of time.
The admin/safety side - lots of inquiries to answer, you have to constantly read between the lines and also deal with many time waster/fantasy booker/boundaries pusher. Answering your regular's text and lots of text from clients you will have to fire eventually because the texting is not for booking. They try to carrot dangle you, make fake promise, ask question they can answer themselves by laziness or straight up waste your time making conversation that leads nowhere. They just want attention so they will find any reason to get it. Multiple times a day. I had to fire 4 last week.
There is the slow times when you worried, the busy time where you work too much and you simply burn out and you need to step away. Traveling constantly. Being away from yoir friends and loved ones on extended period.
Lots of things contribute to make it a mentally difficult job. My advice for any clients would be:
- be respectful of a ladies time (do not overstay, do not over text)
- be respectful of a ladies boundaries (do not pressure, accept a no as a no, do not manipulate to get more)
- show her you value this experience by taking a moment to acknowledge her. Ask her how she is doing, be courteous, be kind
- read our website and respect our booking instructions
That's litteraly all you need to do to show up for us. There is no need for expensive gift or huge tip. Just be a decent human being and treat us as equaly human 🫶
Ps. Thanks for asking. This is really really sweet.
The 6-hr date was his fifth date with the on SP. Something else must have put her off.
I appreciate you for taking the time to share this. Honestly, hearing all that gives me a deeper appreciation for what goes on behind the scenes. It’s easy for myself to focus on just the fantasy, but what you described shows how much emotional labor, attentiveness, and resilience the job actually takes.
I can see how constantly switching gears, being emotionally present, reading people, setting boundaries, and managing safety, can weigh heavy over time. I’m glad you pay attention to the details that actually matter.
It's what separates the average vs the best providers.
Six-hours for the first time sounds like it would be a lot of pressure. (Depending on plans.)
In the past I've had mostly good luck with indies.
Even the dates that got cancelled didn't usually feel like "flaking" so much as something coming up.
I think the emotional labour Josephine is talking about is a huge part of the job that's invisible for lots of clients, but hugely important.
As has been said in this thread before, 6hr is a pretty big commitment and may be the provider had enough bookings that were easier.
I used to like booking long dates but of late, I myself cannot stand a date longer than 2 hours.
I found I was dragging through some dates, found some ladies attractive but boring and it was always a mixed bag.
There is only one lady with whom I do 3 or 4 hour dates, but it is more of a relaxed date as I feel she matches my laid back energy.
Otherwise usually now my bookings are 1.5 to 2 hours.
I used to like booking long dates but of late, I myself cannot stand a date longer than 2 hours.
I found I was dragging through some dates, found some ladies attractive but boring and it was always a mixed bag.
There is only one lady with whom I do 3 or 4 hour dates, but it is more of a relaxed date as I feel she matches my laid back energy.
Otherwise usually now my bookings are 1.5 to 2 hours.
I was July 2025 years old when I understood why some indies have bookers. It can be pure chaos in my phone, I've yet to have a disaster or need to cancel last minute but I can see how it could happen.
But for every time I've cancelled on someone, I've been last minute cancelled on/ghosted/dealt with a time wasting piece of shit one hundred times. I choose to believe whatever reason I'm told, because there's no point in trying to guess if it's a lie or not, and maybe it's none of my business anyway. I once cancelled on someone after being at two funerals in a day, I would have physically been able to be there, but I was beyond spent. I don't remember what I told him but I'm sure it was vague, because the details weren't for him to know.
But for every time I've cancelled on someone, I've been last minute cancelled on/ghosted/dealt with a time wasting piece of shit one hundred times. I choose to believe whatever reason I'm told, because there's no point in trying to guess if it's a lie or not, and maybe it's none of my business anyway. I once cancelled on someone after being at two funerals in a day, I would have physically been able to be there, but I was beyond spent. I don't remember what I told him but I'm sure it was vague, because the details weren't for him to know.
So true. I know a few of these girls pretty well now and once you peel back a bit you see many of them are a mess personally... Messy rooms and houses, always late, going a million different directions, lots of them are neurodivergent, their friends and boyfriends are toxic /draining... It's kind of sad to see how much BS some have going on in their lives especially when you can see they're actually quite sweet and deserve better.
