Is there really such a thing as sexual addiction?

[milehigh]

I started to question whether I would qualify after hearing much lately about this topic. I do know I had a failed marriage that I had to stay in, a great affair for a long time that ended, and lots of encounters with service providers.

Now I question do I ( any many of you, including service providers) instead of an "addiction", just have a huge sex drive. I take care of myself physically, and I think this increases the drive as well.

Now in real life, I do have to say, I find sex with most women boring after you have been with the pros. I probably am done with relationships, but don't mind women as friends. And sometimes sex with friends is cool.

Now I do go out I would say about once a week and pay for sex. My body says go more, but I control myself so I don't blow large sums of money. I also mix who I see, 160-200 one time, oral only another time, and thankfully I know someone retired who sees me and only charges me $60 (sorry no info ). So I mix it up to keep costs down.
Sometimes I can hold out 2 weeks. A year ago I held out only once for 5 weeks and felt like a monk!

I really do try and let the other party have a great time and treat them really nice as well.

I know my description would qualify to some people as sexual addiction, but I don't want help, because it would probably ruin my biggest pleasure in life. They would probably neuter me or whatever(LOL). And I really do not see this as a problem.

I really do not buy there is such a thing as sexual addiction. Just wondering what you all think about this.

"Charlie Sheen"

 

[whitewaterguy]

you are correct, there is no such thing as an addiction, especially to sex...it's simply a personal choice and decision you make. You can choose to have sex, or alternately choose not to. Unless of course you like it so much that you go broke, then your "addiction" suddenly stops, and you revert to whacking off. Hollywood types love the concept of addiction as it allows them an easy out from personal responsibility. they attempt to claim that it was not their fault, their addiciton made them continue...like who would really believe that..obviously not their wives! if i had a lot of money, i too would choose to screw several women in posh surroundings with booze and pot at hand. Unfortunately, i'm a working stiff, so i hobby when time and money allow

 

[alexmst]

I also do not beieve in this in the popular sense of the word. Guys like sex. They like sex with whatever hot girl turns them on at the moment. It is a choice whether to risk one's marriage by fooling around. The vast majority of guys would fool around if they were guaranteed their SO would not find out according to surveys. Getting caught screwing around sucks, but inventing sex addiction as the pop phrase of the year to absolve oneself of responsibility is rather lame. Sex is fun, but we choose to do it or not. Some of us have more willpower than others.

Now if someone couldn't function without sex more than three times a day, one could make a case for a psychological issue. Or if one was compelled to rape constantly to satisfy sexual needs, one might have psychological issues. But Tiger Woods is not a psych case because he, as a randy billionaire, screwed porn stars and waitresses and cheated on his wife. 20 good time girls over 3 years for someone of his means and fame is not a "sex addict". He liked sex, he had sex, he risked his marriage and he lost his marriage. He is probably not celibate over his loss. Because he apperaed to be banging everything in a skirt, of course public sympathy was with his wife. If he had one or two affairs maybe his marriage would have survived, but not that many women when one of them is saying "Tiger said he never loved his wife anyway". Never a good idea to tell the casual flings that you never loved your wife, esp if you are famous.

So in a very narrow clinical sense there is such a thing as sex addiction, but it isn't what most men suffer from and is an excuse for lack of willpower IMHO.

Now I'm not saying don't go forth and get layed by any means, just don't say you'e crazy as an excuse if you ever get caught by an SO.

 

[milehigh]

Hey ever think Tiger's wife was real bad in bed? He may have had the option of going from that to the wildest sex imaginable.

I myself often think living in GTA that I am living the dream - so many super looking women who know what the heck they are doing. (ProS)

I don't mean to bash civilians - but you get - "I am really embarrased giving Oral - please turn out the lights so you can't see me." or lying like a corpse.

You go from that to the Indy 500.

Imagine being Tiger with that huge income - God, I'd be banging so much, I wouldn't make Golf Dates (haha).

Any rate, I tend to agree with you guys. I think often overlooked, is that some people have huge sex drives and it is just a physical trait, which gets enhanced when one takes care of oneself.

And I would bet to say that averaged out, anyone on this board has a much higher sex drive than "average."

I myself look at it this way.... I am extremely happy with what I've got. Although my life style may be frowned upon, it is a conscious, thought out choice by myself, and do I ever enjoy it.

Imagine being a celebrity... you would get slammed for such a life.

 

[rateyourescort]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_addiction

I don't think there's a reason to believe there is no such thing as sex addiction. Just like gambling, if you have zero control over it and it is affecting your life, then it is a problem... If you're living healthy, happy social life and have sex everyday, I doubt it's a problem. I wish I was that dude...

I started to question whether I would qualify after hearing much lately about this topic. I do know I had a failed marriage that I had to stay in, a great affair for a long time that ended, and lots of encounters with service providers.

Now I question do I ( any many of you, including service providers) instead of an "addiction", just have a huge sex drive. I take care of myself physically, and I think this increases the drive as well.

Now in real life, I do have to say, I find sex with most women boring after you have been with the pros. I probably am done with relationships, but don't mind women as friends. And sometimes sex with friends is cool.

Now I do go out I would say about once a week and pay for sex. My body says go more, but I control myself so I don't blow large sums of money. I also mix who I see, 160-200 one time, oral only another time, and thankfully I know someone retired who sees me and only charges me $60 (sorry no info ). So I mix it up to keep costs down.
Sometimes I can hold out 2 weeks. A year ago I held out only once for 5 weeks and felt like a monk!

I really do try and let the other party have a great time and treat them really nice as well.

I know my description would qualify to some people as sexual addiction, but I don't want help, because it would probably ruin my biggest pleasure in life. They would probably neuter me or whatever(LOL). And I really do not see this as a problem.

I really do not buy there is such a thing as sexual addiction. Just wondering what you all think about this.

"Charlie Sheen"

 

[WoodPeckr]

Does TERB count?.....

 

[SKINHUNTER]

it counts...its the hunt that is addicting....any way you look at it...if it adversely affects your ability to function normally and you have no control over it.... its addiction...unless your net worth is more than 2.5 million then its just a problem....

 

[GotGusto]

Imagine being Tiger with that huge income - God, I'd be banging so much, I wouldn't make Golf Dates (haha).

With his money, I would literally have an assembly line of hot women at my disposal 24/7. I'd tongue fuck their sexy little assholes throughout the day and night, between meals and walks on the beach on the ocean property that I would own.

I would cocoon myself in a world of pussy and ass, and indulge in extravagant depravity, with not a care for anything or anybody else. There would be no men in my kingdom and all the females would address me as God, Master, or Lord.

I like to dream big.

Someday... someday...

 

[Rixon]

you are correct, there is no such thing as an addiction, especially to sex

There are thousands of people suffering from various addictions right now that would disagree with you. There is such a thing as addiction. When you know you should stop, wish you could stop, have your life affected in terrible ways, but still cannot stop, you are addicted and it's horrible. Do you think junkies enjoy stealing from their family, putting their children at risk, and ruining their entire lives? There is a lack of control that is part of the definition of addiction that makes it far from a personal choice. Sure there is a case to make that not all people who claim to be addicted to something truly are. But that doesn't mean that "there is no such thing as an addiction".

 

[oldjones]

If the concept of addiction helps you—or whoever has to live with you—understand and deal with your behaviour, then it's as real as can be. It's not the same as the classic chemical addictions produced by alcohol, tobacco, opiates and other drugs, but as we've developed better knowledge of neurochemistry we've discovered that all sorts of patterns we used to use the term 'psychological addiction, or dependence' for actually have chemical components to them.

What really defines it as an addiction, as compared say to buying season tickets for a half-dozen years, watching everything you can on TV and subscribing to the fanzines is that you—or others—see it as a problem, one that is not getting solved. Whether that problem is your dull and boring one-track conversation, disease states and pathologies attributable to the behaviour or the impact on your wallet or wife, if you cannot adjust that behaviour to bring the parts of your life into the balance you and your family want, you're addicted.

So: Yes, there is such a thing as sex addiction. You'll have to tell us if you're addicted, but I'd say even asking the question's a big hint.

 

[SS Sharla]

I've said this on another thread, but sexual addiction is a term to be used by professionals to describe a set of behaviour not to absolve anyone of their actions. You can't just say you have a sexual addiction because you like a lot of sex. The term addiction means that a behaviour in your life has gotten so out of hand that it disrupts normal functioning. People with sex addictions often are not even enjoying the sex. An example of sexual addiction would be a person who has sex/masterbates so much that they burn friction sores on their genitals that are never given a chance to heal because they feel compelled to continue dispite the pain. These are the types of cases psychologist are looking at when they give these labels.

Labels in medical terms are not used to absolve people of behaviour. They are just to outline the behaviour and the treatment. When someone is diagnosed with sexual addiction a large part of the "treatment" is focused on helping them to understand that they can have control over the behaviour and why it has become so disruptive. Usually there is some past trama that has changed the way they understand or react to sexual stimulus that simply needs to be addressed so they can have healthy sexual interaction. Do people abuse the term: Yes. Does that mean the condition doesn't exist. No.

If you are able to put any sort of limits on your sex and feel comfortable with the acts you partake in chances are you do not have a sexual addiction. Cheating on a wife and having it end the marriage is not sexual addiction. Bringing her home AIDS because you have sex with extremely high risk people without any reguard for her safety because you feel it is your right as a man to satisfy whatever sexual drives you naturally have . . . that's the kind of behaviour psychologist deal with.

 

[big.guy_13]

There is sexual addiction in the same way there is ADHD or any of that crap. Do you want to know why kids are fidgety in class? It's because they don't run around outside as much as they used to. So they have pent-up energy. Just let them run around (i.e. force them to run around) and that will solve the problem.

 

[oldjones]

And exercise also cures excessive masturbation, as every XIXth C quack knew. My haven't we come a long way.

 

[FAST]

I can't

Is there really such a thing as sexual addiction?

Only if you can afford it.

FAST

 

[frankcastle]

Sex addiction is real.

You post screams of an addict. The line that sticks with me is you thinking that 2 to 5 weeks is a long time to hold out.

If you don't think you're an addict you are entitled to that opinion but don't dismiss the possibility that there are others who are addicted.

Some people mentioned ADHD..... I'll say this like addiction perhaps people misdiagnose or throw out the diagnosis too often but it is still real.

I'm sure there are plenty of sex offenders in prison who are honest examples of people who couldn't keep their addiction in check. Maybe like celebrities some use addiction as an excuse but some of them are probably legit.

Running up debts, taking risks, lying to people closest to you. Could easily characterize an addict of one type or another.

 

[681david]

It is real addiction. For some more than others lol.

 

[Mencken]

Totally depends on the definition of addiction.

Wanting sex and thinking about it 24/7 might be a symptom....but what about never really acting on that?

I spent more time in my life thinking about sex...by far...than anything else. But I have been basically boring when it comes to actual experience. Other friends could focus on work, careers, businesses...and were able to achieve more success than I...perhaps because they didn't spend/waste as much time fantasizing about sex. I don't really know...

So would I be an addict?....Perhaps, but only the same way that a dry alcoholic is still an alcoholic. I believe that sex had a much bigger place in my thoughts and I spent more time on it than average. But maybe that is still just within the normal range.

In the end it doesn't matter much....the fact that I didn't do much about those thoughts kept me from going broke, having ugly affairs, etc....so my life probably was a bit more even keeled than most addicts. But who knows how things might have been if I could have been as obsessed with making money...for example.

 

[Major Major]

But Tiger Woods is not a psych case because he, as a randy billionaire, screwed porn stars and waitresses and cheated on his wife. 20 good time girls over 3 years for someone of his means and fame is not a "sex addict". He liked sex, he had sex, he risked his marriage and he lost his marriage. He is probably not celibate over his loss. Because he apperaed to be banging everything in a skirt, of course public sympathy was with his wife. If he had one or two affairs maybe his marriage would have survived, but not that many women when one of them is saying "Tiger said he never loved his wife anyway". Never a good idea to tell the casual flings that you never loved your wife, esp if you are famous.

Thank you. I was wondering if I was the only one that thought this because everyone else insisted he had some sort of a "problem"... what problem for god sakes.... he fucked (like most others) and he got caught. The guy is a billionaire celebrity.....women throw pussy at him like frisbees. You had to know this was going to happen. If it happens all the time to joe nobody than its certainly happening with him in a big way.

The only thing that shocked me was how dumb and naive he was about it.