Question to EVERYONE

[Nooki_23]

I was playing tennis in an indoor club today, and my girlfriend and I were scheduled from 2-3pm. At 2:05pm, she went to get a drink, so I asked the couple in the next court if they wanted to play "doubles" for the last 10 minutes (from 2:50pm to 3pm). They agreed. My girlfriend comes back, and then we play, and at 2:50pm I tell her that I asked the couple in the next court if they wanted to play. She said it was disrespectful that I didn't ask her first. I replied thinking for 10 small minutes (it's not like I made the agreement for an hour)...and then she said "why did you ask them?"...almost implying that I asked as the woman because was attractive. All in all, it created a big argument, and I'd like to get the perspective of both men and women....which statement would you lean towards:

a) she had a right to get upset, as I should have asked her out of respect
b) that's kind of weird for her to get upset over something like that.

I'll take any and all criticisms!

 

[Mr. Piggy]

I would go with answer (b).

 

[papasmerf]

You are a male and as such you have no right to question.

When with her your only position in life is to agree with her........If you want to change plans it had better be her idea.

If you ever thought it was a joke that the mans only room in the house is the garage. Better think again.

 

[squash500]

almost implying that I asked as the woman because was attractive

As an avid tennis player my first observation would be that only 10 minutes of doubles is neither here nor there. IMHO, I think it could be that your girlfriend might have been jealous of the other attractive woman. IMHO, I think your girlfriend was overeacting but what do I know as I am presently single .

 

[Chimpanzeethat]

she's technically right, but practically wrong.

 

[Nooki_23]

thanks...

I see your point, however if it was an hour I could see the issue, but for 10 minutes I don't really see an issue with it or the need to ask.

 

[hoppy625]

I would say if you play against other couples on a regular basis then the answer should be b). If you seldom or have never played against another couple my answer would be a).

 

[Terminator2000]

I agree with this one:

On the other hand, 10 minutes of doubles is not going to kill her.

So, I'll go with choice selection (b)

Its only a game of tennis. No big deal. Chill out.

But then again, women DO have pms sometimes act and behave irrationally and pick arguments over the most irrational things.

That could be it.

 

[hairyfucker]

Upset is an extreme. but for her to be annoyed is fair.

You asked the other couple and then proceeded to play for 45 minutes and never mentioned the plan at the end. You simply could have avoided all (or at least most - she is female ) by just mentioning to her when she got back PRIOR to starting to play for 45 minutes that you asked the couple next door (with the hottie) to play doubles at the end. At that point she could have said “not interested” and you just change course and no harm no foul or she could have said she wanted to play doubles for the hour and maybe some mixed doubles again later than evening...

But since you waited till the exact minute that the previous agreement stated was the start time to tell her you gave her no options but to either go along or look poorly. For a easy going person this is not normally an issue but for many it could be.

 

[Esco!]

Women

 

[shakenbake]

(b) all the way, man!

 

[Terminator2000]

If this is how upset she gets over a tennis game. I wonder how upset she'll get when you both divorce - and she takes half (or more) of your wealth.

 

[shakenbake]

That is the problem. - The need to ask.

You may be the type of person who is not bothered by being volunteered for something. I, personally, do not like it at all. I want to make up my own mind. I wouldn't have freaked out or caused a fight, but I would have said that next time, ask me first. I like making my own choices.

Yes, but you are a reasonable and rationale woman. I applaud you for it. BTW, there are unreasonable and irrational men, as you well know.

Getting back to Nooki_23's situation, I think that his GF was wrong in that a couple is made of two individuals. Why should one member always be right and the other lose thier individuality? Remember, she was away when the other couple asked. How could they have asked here if she wasn't there to ask? A reasonable person would have reacted as Kiarra, and not freaked out, but would have stated her preferences for next time that a similar situation would arise.

Then again, I don't know all the dynamics of this couple. However, it seems to me that, based on the OP's description, his GF might have some personal issues to deal with. I am sorry, but I don't buy the crap/myth/stereotype that the woman is always right, even if she is wrong. And, my wife agrees with me on this one, after all the years that we have been married, in a realtively happy relationship where we talk about issues.

 

[Papi Chulo]

If this is how upset she gets over a tennis game. I wonder how upset she'll get when you both divorce - and she takes half (or more) of your wealth.

Or if she has to pick up his socks.... or if he forgets to put the toilet seat down.. or if he looks at her in the wrong way or says the wrong thing to her!!

Sounds like he will be walking on eggshells the whole time he is with her.

He should run while he still can! Sounds like she has issues

 

[Nooki_23]

we have our answer

my girlfriend's most recent comment:

"you were looking at her every minute"

we have our answer folks.

 

[Esco!]

Also it sounds like she doesnt trust you, because she doesnt trust herself.

Hire a P.I., I bet she's screwing around you

 

[Terminator2000]

So much for my PMS theory...

 

[papasmerf]

my girlfriend's most recent comment:

"you were looking at her every minute"

we have our answer folks.

and your answer to her should have been

Of course I was, she knows how to play tennis.........BTW, how you getting home?

 

[Esco!]

This is one of those rare times when Smerf makes me laugh

 

[Mr. Piggy]

my girlfriend's most recent comment:

"you were looking at her every minute"

we have our answer folks.

That sounds something like someone I was with years ago. I couldn't even glance toward another woman without her thinking I wanted to fuck them.
We were at her mothers for dinner one evening, her sister, brother in law and neice were there too. It was the first time meeting them so they were asking questions about me and I was answering. Later that night when we got home she got real pissed at me because I carried on conversation with her sister and she accused me of wanting to fuck her. That was the end of our relationship. The next day, I told her to get out.
I have no use for someone who is insecure, and it sounds like your GF is.