Science Jokes

[SchlongConery]

A chemist and his friend walk into a bar

The chemist say "I'll have a glass of H2O please"

The barman hands him a glass of water and he drinks it and he's fine

The chemist's friend says "I'll have a glass of H2O too please"

He drank it and died

 

[SchlongConery]

I was gonna tell you guys a chemistry joke but.....all the good ones Argon

 

[nobody123]

A neutron walked into a bar and said "I'd like a beer, please."

After the bartender gave him one, he said "How much will that be?"

"For you?" said the bartender "No charge."

 

[danmand]

A chemist and his friend walk into a bar

The chemist say "I'll have a glass of H2O please"

The barman hands him a glass of water and he drinks it and he's fine

The chemist's friend says "I'll have a glass of H2O too please"

He drank it and died

Good one.

 

[nobody123]

A neutron walked into a bar and said "I'd like a beer, please."

After the bartender gave him one, he said "How much will that be?"

"For you?" said the bartender "No charge."

A proton tells the above tale to an electron as if it were true.
The electron is having none of it and tells the Proton "You're full of shit".
Proton says, "No, I swear it's a true story".
Electron sez "Are you sure?"
Proton sez "I'm positive."

 

[danmand]

I was gonna tell you guys a chemistry joke but.....all the good ones Argon

Rolling On the F Laughing My Ass Off

 

[SchlongConery]

Argon walks into a bar. The bar tender says "sorry, we don't serve noble gases here," Argon doesn't react.

 

[SchlongConery]

Rolling On the F Laughing My Ass Off

That's gratifying. My chemistry jokes don't usually get a reaction.

 

[danmand]

Argon walks into a bar. The bar tender says "sorry, we don't serve noble gases here," Argon doesn't react.

Your jokes are becoming more and more Krypton.

 

[SchlongConery]

Your jokes are becoming more and more Krypton.

You want me to barium?

 

[WoodPeckr]

You want me to barium?

In lead....:eyebrows:

 

[bobistheowl]

What's gay salt?

Sodumi Chloride!

 

[Phil C. McNasty]

You want me to barium?

May God have mercury on your soul

 

[Mod99]

More puns.

I guess we'll all just have to sulfur through 'em.

 

[SchlongConery]

More puns.

I guess we'll all just have to sulfur through 'em.

You don't like my chemistry work play?

Well, you Sulphur, Uranium, Carbon, Potassium.

 

[blackrock13]

Punters!

 

[red]

Punters!

no puns so really elemental at best

 

[blackrock13]

The song would actually be longer today with the recent additions of Darmstadtium (Ds), Roentgenium (Rg) and Copernicium (Cn) Flerovium and Livermorium.

 

[great bear]

I feel insalted at the level of these chemical puns.

 

[Mod99]

Lead the way!

(Ceasium the day!!)