Obsession Massage

This game is called “Survival of the Fittest”

Aloha

New member
Mar 31, 2005
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Just a brief overview.

My writing skills in my opinion are much to be desired. Why am I writing this, then you ask? Because maybe someone will listen, maybe someone will ridicule or maybe someone will sit with their finger to their lip and ponder these words and their thoughts.
It started 6 years ago (Oct 2001) with a very naive married mother of three, who had so many hopes and dreams for her family and life. And they were not getting fulfilled with 5 people living on $50,000 gross/yr.
This industry just happened upon her. Maybe it was the evil lady across the street that suggested, “We try our hand at this game”
But this game quickly ate up this evil lady. But the strong and silent one carried on. Sitting and watching these little lasses,
she learnt so much in such a short period of time. The hunger took over and the challenges got easier. Soon after it was not as exciting; so she ventured out on her own to build her own masterpiece. Thinking she would build it better and excel above the rest.
She quickly became even more daring and ambitious. She knew it had been lurking beneath for a very long time. And it finally came out.
She started to develop her game skills so accurately that the response was overwhelming.
She hunted out a partner. Someone that was as hungry and strong as she was. She found this exotic beauty. But also found she wasn’t as reliable or dedicated as herself.
This secret she was hiding from the public would or could never be discovered.
After she accomplished what she set out to do she became bored and careless. She started making mistakes and was outed. The risk just made her even more determined. After a few more attempts, she finally had it figured out. But this time she started letting her guard down. She started to enjoy it. The fantasy, the thrill and the risk.
The money really didn’t hold priority anymore. Just to pay the bills to remain in the same location. She justified every movement from fantasy to reality. So much, so her real life started to suffer without her realization. There were wake up calls along the way. Only if she chose to listen to them.
The shrapnel was so deep that it required assistance from an outside source.
She does not regret the 6 years experience in this particular business. It was required to get her to where she is today and where she will be tomorrow.
Humans are amazing creatures. They can adapt to any situation. It all depends on” how well” you adapt. If you take on a project, Don’t just do it. Do the best damn job you can and excel.
Looking back it was an accomplishment and she has a lot to show from her experiences.
Maybe she is not as fit as she thought she was.
Maybe she is not as strong as she thought she was.
Maybe this game is and always will be too complicated and got the best of her.
Just maybe she was dealing with the human psyche
(Her own and others)
Or maybe she is just taking a well-deserved break!!!!
 
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sirloinofsteak

Member? Yeah, I got one!
Aug 3, 2004
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about there
All I can say is this: I've met Shauna 3 times (well 2 times in private, once in public). I found someone caring, very deep, and in synch with herself and the world. No, I didn't fall in love, but I fell in comfort, if that makes sense. I thank her for making me feel like a man for an hour. And I mean that in the "big" head, not the little one. I often think about my encounter with her and what I would have done different. Not being rushed (my schedule) would have helped. Anyway, it is not about the quantity, but the quality. I just wished I wouldn't have held back as much as I did!
 

Tiffany_69

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Mar 6, 2007
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The Hammer
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very

nautilus said:
I think she's much stronger, and much smarter than she's letting on.
ME TO.....

Greet writing skills and this post so deep wow, I cannot find words to describe thoughts and feelings right now, I have been stuck here 30min reading over, over, over. I know I am on a journey and putting every waking moment and fibre of my very being into my goal. May you be blessed Hun in anything and everything you do in life. I have spent another 30 minutes going over other posts of yours. This one hit me so hard.
 

Rigel7

New member
Mar 26, 2005
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Rigel7, Beta Orionis constellation
Well said. Your writing skills express your emotions very well. I have told you before I know your persona very well. You are a very intelligent woman, and I hope that your strength will guide you to make sure that this is just not a well deserved break.

I could expound a lot more, but this will sufice. Luv ya (not in the normal sense of the word, and, of course, you know that)
 

magicmanofmassage

Gone to the future.
Aloha said:
Humans are amazing creatures. They can adapt to any situation. It all depends on” how well” you adapt. If you take on a project, Don’t just do it. Do the best damn job you can and excel.
I am going to resist my tendency to write too much, some thing are best left to direct conversations.

I have concentrated the last six months on making my life much less complicated. and believe that:
"Maybe she is just needs to realize that she can have it all.....and just go for it."
 

thaiboy

Active member
Feb 23, 2004
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To the artist formerly known as Shauna: Wow! From one writer to a newly discovered one, your thought provoking musings are extremely well expressed. Perhaps there's a book about your experiences in the future? I don't know what it is about this time of year but it seems to have a lot of us reflecting on our hobby lately. Very well written!
 

justhavingfun

New member
Nov 8, 2006
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words that speak more than just words

Shauna, you have been a friend for a long time, and I hope that you will remain a friend for as long as I am on this earth.

Your "story" has such deep expressive words, filled with intelligence, emotion and feelings - anyone who really knows you would say .. it is just like you! Your writing skills were wonderful - as you can tell that it was written after much thought and from the heart. Ridicule words spoken from the heart, I would not ever think so.

We all come to this life for different reasons... and as you said, there is shrapnel associated with the business, emotional and physical. But, is this not part of being human? We thrive for experiences, for thrills, for emotions. The risks are part of the business for many of us - some of us choose to ignore this or not consider it, some perhaps subconsciously, and hidden deep in the abyss of our minds. Some of us may lower our guard hoping to be found. Maybe, the shrapnel as hard as it is, is life's way to bring back our feelings. Consider the life of a person who deals with social work and sees some awful things in life - over time they become numb - and have a hard time feeling the real world around them. This life in many ways is so similar. Except... from time to time you meet "real" people - people who you share your experiences with, and you feel they are part of your life.

Thank you for sharing your words with us. You know that my sincere wish is that life brings you the very best, and that your final direction is the one that you want in your heart. I think of you often. I smile when I fondly remember the precious times together, and you will forever remain in my heart as a friend. If you ever want a shoulder to lean on .... I will be there for you ... always.
 

boomboom

Well-known member
Jun 29, 2003
5,703
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Central Ont. between here & there
Shauna has been known to many of us with the gift of the tongue, lips & fingers. She knows deeply how to use them. Shauna was always deep in many ways especially when you took the time to get to know her. Even though I hid behind the name, we had a few good conversations & one could easily tell she was a very well read lady with knowledge beyond her years. She has now used her fingers & knowledge in a way for many of us the reflect on her keyboard skills as we ponder & examine the words before us. Thanks Shauna, the time to reflect brings a warm smile to my face for the chance to meet a special lady.

Boomboom
 

mac

Well-known member
Aug 19, 2001
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i have met shauna a number of times....a great lady as everybody here agrees. What i dont understand though is why write this brief overview at this point?
 

magicmanofmassage

Gone to the future.
mac said:
i have met shauna a number of times....a great lady as everybody here agrees. What i dont understand though is why write this brief overview at this point?
I believe part of the healing process is getting things out of your head and onto paper. Due to the nature of the business, you don't write this down at home, or work. You can't discuss it at home, or at work. That leaves terb, a place where you can expel the demons in your mind because there are others that have been there.
Maybe, just maybe, instead of being ridculed by terbites, you will get feedback that will help you get through the times of doubt.

Shauna deserves nothing less than positive support because I've never read a negative thought about her from anyone that mattered on this board.

Life's a "ball" babe, when you're feeling down get your nine iron out and get the "ball" back up in the air! :)
 

Aloha

New member
Mar 31, 2005
546
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Thanks Magic
Yes I am getting the "swing" of things!!!
 

justhavingfun

New member
Nov 8, 2006
355
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magicmanofmassage said:
... Shauna deserves nothing less than positive support because I've never read a negative thought about her from anyone that mattered on this board....
Magic ... I don't know if I count, but you know that I for one would never say a negative thing about such a wonderful lady ....

Aloha said:
Thanks Magic
Yes I am getting the "swing" of things!!!
Shauna, good to hear hun .... miss you a big bunch :( Your words may be part of the healing process, but it is very evident that they certainly hit a chord with the people who care about you.
 

magicmanofmassage

Gone to the future.
justhavingfun said:
Magic ... I don't know if I count, but you know that I for one would never say a negative thing about such a wonderful lady ....


Shaun, good to hear hun .... miss you a big bunch :( Your words may be part of the healing process, but it is very evident that they certainly hit a chord with the people who care about you.
That my friend was a silly statement, both you and your alter ego count a great deal. As a matter of fact in fond memory of Eeyore, Elmo and Pookie...I dub thee "The Count" and Halloween is not far away Coouuunnnt.
 
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