Witty stuff you can say in conversation

[Mandala]

Memorize some wit for when the topic comes up



Nicholas Cage acting teacher must be an acotopus

Without my morning coffee I have no identifiable personality

• A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.

 

[bazokajoe]

When they invented the clock, how did they know what time it was?

 

[Mandala]

Last time I cooked a big dinner the fire truck ruined it

I call my dog stay. Come here stay. Poor dog

 

[Ol' Dirty Bastard]

How much?

 

[onomatopoeia]

Last time I cooked a big dinner the fire truck ruined it

I call my dog stay. Come here stay. Poor dog

Steven Wright joke from the mid 80's.

 

[barnacler]

None of that is wit.

Wit is what you do ON THE SPOT, spontaneously, working with the existing conversation, not repeating something someone else said.

 

[PvtJoker]

None of that is wit.

Neither is your post

 

[Mandala]

Wit is what you do ON THE SPOT, spontaneously, working with the existing conversation, not repeating something someone else said.

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

 

[Mandala]

Steven Wright joke from the mid 80's.

"Small world but I would not wanna paint it"

 

[xmontrealer]

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

The best jokes or humorous remarks are spontaneous and part of the current conversation, or even personal humorous anecdotes from your own life, as much as you're willing to share them...

Certainly telling a joke you heard from another person or comedian is ok, but unless it is very funny and not time-worn, not nearly as effective in establishing rapport...

 

[xix]

This afternoon my Viet co-worker asked me, if her shirt got stain from her mixing some 'glue'. She miss pronouns some words.
What I heard..
- Xix is there wide on shirt?
Me thinking why is she pulling her work cover all suit down showing me her t-shirt - then it hit me she said
- Xix is there white on my shirt? referring to the colour of the glue.
I said no.
Then I was about to say lower your shirt down to see if it went under it where the chest area is.
I backed out. She wouldn't get the joke or wit.

 

[barnacler]

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

I am merely pointing out the difference between witty and funny.

If you repeat it, it is or can be funny.

If you make it up yourself, you have used your wit, and it is witty.