Witty stuff you can say in conversation

[Mandala]

Memorize some wit for when the topic comes up



Nicholas Cage acting teacher must be an acotopus

Without my morning coffee I have no identifiable personality

• A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.

 

[bazokajoe]

When they invented the clock, how did they know what time it was?

 

[Mandala]

Last time I cooked a big dinner the fire truck ruined it

I call my dog stay. Come here stay. Poor dog

 

[Ol' Dirty Bastard]

How much?

 

[onomatopoeia]

Last time I cooked a big dinner the fire truck ruined it

I call my dog stay. Come here stay. Poor dog

Steven Wright joke from the mid 80's.

 

[barnacler]

None of that is wit.

Wit is what you do ON THE SPOT, spontaneously, working with the existing conversation, not repeating something someone else said.

 

[PvtJoker]

None of that is wit.

Neither is your post

 

[Mandala]

Wit is what you do ON THE SPOT, spontaneously, working with the existing conversation, not repeating something someone else said.

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

 

[Mandala]

Steven Wright joke from the mid 80's.

"Small world but I would not wanna paint it"

 

[xmontrealer]

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

The best jokes or humorous remarks are spontaneous and part of the current conversation, or even personal humorous anecdotes from your own life, as much as you're willing to share them...

Certainly telling a joke you heard from another person or comedian is ok, but unless it is very funny and not time-worn, not nearly as effective in establishing rapport...

 

[xix]

This afternoon my Viet co-worker asked me, if her shirt got stain from her mixing some 'glue'. She miss pronouns some words.
What I heard..
- Xix is there wide on shirt?
Me thinking why is she pulling her work cover all suit down showing me her t-shirt - then it hit me she said
- Xix is there white on my shirt? referring to the colour of the glue.
I said no.
Then I was about to say lower your shirt down to see if it went under it where the chest area is.
I backed out. She wouldn't get the joke or wit.

 

[barnacler]

That is exactly what you are doing, is it not?

The idea is to use the jokes with the existing conversation.

If the joke is someone elses why should that matter?

If it is well known joke by a famous person
So what????????? That makes it even better


You are not claiming the joke is yours , you are simply injecting humor into a social conversation

It is not like you are onstage in a comedy club stealing someone else's material


Count to a chillion, it will help you relax

I am merely pointing out the difference between witty and funny.

If you repeat it, it is or can be funny.

If you make it up yourself, you have used your wit, and it is witty.

 

[Mandala]

I am merely pointing out the difference between witty and funny.

If you repeat it, it is or can be funny.

If you make it up yourself, you have used your wit, and it is witty.

Not to get too fine, but the post is about witty remarks, not where it originated from.

If you use someone ele's s witty remarks you will eventually start making your own.

Comedians learn how to create humor. They become funny after years of honing their craft and learning what is funny

 

[Mandala]

Let me put this another way.

Many years ago I did a home recording of myself playing Chuck Berry's "Little Queenie". I played rhythm and lead electric guitar, used a Moog synthesizer for the bass, an early drum machine for the drum track, and my own crappy vocals, all recorded on a 4 track Teac Portastudio. Rather amateurish and lo-fi. I later made a digital copy of it and have it on my phone in my music playlist.

Sometimes, with long time regulars, I would play it for them. Mainly due to the guitar playing being better than they expected, several were, or feigned to be, impressed, cuz I did it myself.

I have also played favourite songs by other artists in many sessions. While the lady involved might enjoy my taste in music, the response is never as enthusiastic as when it was in response to the song I performed and recorded myself.

Is your point that you get better by practising the talents of others?
Create your own piece, but it will not be 100% yours as you will have learned from others

Wit is learned the same way

The conversational wit of late night talk show hosts was learned from years of hard work

Memorize great wit and you will soon be making your own

 

[xmontrealer]

Is your point that you get better by practising the talents of others?
Create your own piece, but it will not be 100% yours as you will have learned from others

Wit is learned the same way

The conversational wit of late night talk show hosts was learned from years of hard work

Memorize great wit and you will soon be making your own

I realized that it was not a good example of spontaneous wit, which is why I deleted my post shortly after putting it up.

 

[Big Rig]

Insults are sometimes needed

If you ran like you run your mouth you would be in great shape

If you dont want a sarcastic answer dont ask a stupid question

Dont raise your voice improve your argument



Who ties your shoelaces ?

You can tell if someone is wise by their questions

Sign said wet floor so he did

Time to get away from you as my survival instincts are kicking in

Anyone can be a bedwetter but from the top of the bureau