Ahhh jwm,
Welcome to the club.
I love telling unsuspecting strangers the story of my Colonoscopy. As y2k mentioned you haven't enjoyed the probe, until that optical dildo has been shoved up your ass 80cm!!
Thats almost 3 FEET of optical dildo man. The highlight for me of course was the fact that I had got a front row seat to a 36" colour tv and two lovely nurses behind me getting an even better view!
So imagine, you are crouched on the table in the fetus position, like you have just been kicked hard in the ball sack.
Two lovelys come to your aid while you are on your side- you see a little empathy in there eyes. No wait, that ain't empathy> it's glee. They lube up their gloves, and begin the digital penetration preperation. As I am enduring this, I think to myself how much money I would be saving if I were a true fetishist!!!
So in strolls the director, cameraman, gaffer, and make-up. OOOOPs, I mean the Butt Doctor "Hey, morning Chivas, how are you this morning". Do I reallllly have to answer that Doc, I think to myself. "Well Doc, it's a little early in the morning. But I am feeling very violated!"
"Now Chivas, it's not that bad. We'll been done soon."
It didn't take me long to figure out why he said it wasn't that bad. For the next 20 minutes ( It felt like an hour, BTW), he stuck his optical didlo up my hole, all the while blowing air into my hole while he was traveling to give that moster an easier route to it's final frontier! Ladies, I totally get the whole cramp and bloated feeling now. I don't know how you handle it once a month. I mean I was literally white knuckling that operating table, each and every time he blew more air, or went another foot up my ass! I finally knew why there were 2 nurses in the rom that day. One to tell me that everything would be alright, and the other to strap me down to that damn table so I wouldn't kick the shit out of the camera operator!
As we were finishing up the Doc told me how good I'd been with it all- I felt like a little kid. "Hey Doc, where's my lollipop?"
He was almost farking done, I mean really- 3 inches from escaping the black hole, sucking all that air out as he went ( relief), when just as he was about to plan his exit- " Oh, i think I see something.." that was the last I heard before he shoved it up my ass without warning another 6 inches! No kiss, no hug, just brute force man. F*&K, was I pissed. After they untied me, and woke up, the Doc was nowhere to be found.
The outcome. I have a lovely 30 minute video, entitled> "The Black Abyss". I love to pull it out and throw it in the VCR when someone comes over whining and complaining about some treatment they had. JWM....welcome to the club brother. I hope you got the video, makes it all worth it!
