And my point is that that's idiotic. Making them more depressed is going to make them less motivated, not more motivated.
Two friends are MORBIDLY obese. What to do?
- Thread starter JEFF247
- Start date
What does their doctor say to them? Usually when a doctor says you're going to die if you don't do something about (insert condition here) that's pretty good motivation for change. Not that they couldn't be large and healthy but from your description it doesn't sound that way.
Then I honestly don't know what to do with people like this.
They hate they way they are. There is a clear and feasible way they can change themselves. This is elementary logic here: if you don't want to be obese, stop eating so much and do some exercise.
If someone can't behave logically for whatever reason, they are irrational. In vernacular terms they are stupid. Depression is not a relevant factor in this conclusion.
Try not to be an overbearing ass.
People who have weight problems, eating problems, or whatever DO NOT like to hear things like "I weigh the same as in high school" or "You just aren't motivated enough".
My younger sister had a problem after her first child and she detested when people constantly gave her unhelpful comments.
Just be supportive and ask your friends what THEY want to do about it and that you are available to help in whatever way they need you to help. It has to be their decision or it won't work.
People who have weight problems, eating problems, or whatever DO NOT like to hear things like "I weigh the same as in high school" or "You just aren't motivated enough".
My younger sister had a problem after her first child and she detested when people constantly gave her unhelpful comments.
Just be supportive and ask your friends what THEY want to do about it and that you are available to help in whatever way they need you to help. It has to be their decision or it won't work.
A lot of overweight people eat out of comfort. It makes them feel better. The worse they feel about themselves, the more they eat.
If they're serious about changing, you should have them speak to professionals. Nutrionist, Doctor, Personal Trainer..... Nutritionists will be able to give them good tips on foods they can make for themselves, healithier versions/alternatives of the foods they like. Personal Trainers will keep them motivated at the gym. Most people go to the gym on their own and expect to lose weight right away, and after a few weeks of going infrequently and doing the excercises incorrectly without results, they give up. Personal Trainers will guide them on how to gain the best results, and will help them track their improvement, no matter how large or small. I had one friend that lost over 200 pounds, and always says he could never have done it without his personal trainer. A doctor will help them track their situation internally, and make sure they don't hurt themselves with unhealthy diets, diet pills, etc...
If they're serious about changing, you should have them speak to professionals. Nutrionist, Doctor, Personal Trainer..... Nutritionists will be able to give them good tips on foods they can make for themselves, healithier versions/alternatives of the foods they like. Personal Trainers will keep them motivated at the gym. Most people go to the gym on their own and expect to lose weight right away, and after a few weeks of going infrequently and doing the excercises incorrectly without results, they give up. Personal Trainers will guide them on how to gain the best results, and will help them track their improvement, no matter how large or small. I had one friend that lost over 200 pounds, and always says he could never have done it without his personal trainer. A doctor will help them track their situation internally, and make sure they don't hurt themselves with unhealthy diets, diet pills, etc...
I show them my before and after pics...and tell them that I did not diet and just ate differently and started taking better care of myself.
I also tell them that if I can do it...anyone can
I also tell them that if I can do it...anyone can
For the morbidly obese, chances are they have tried a series of different things already and none has been successful.
The only known effective cure is the stomach surgery, and it is harsh.
For the marginally obese, weight watchers and personal training at the gym. Myself, stress makes me eat. Gaining weight means reduce stress. Exercise helps reduce stress too.
The only known effective cure is the stomach surgery, and it is harsh.
For the marginally obese, weight watchers and personal training at the gym. Myself, stress makes me eat. Gaining weight means reduce stress. Exercise helps reduce stress too.
Well said. I think it is stress with both. They know it, but seem helpless to do anything.
We all know they haven't really TRIED anything. They've dabbled. To say they tried eating right,ok, after 10 years how did they look? "Oh, they only were able to eat right for a few days". Same with exercise. same with whatever. fatso's haven't really tried. they are actually very happy to be the way they are. think about it. eat what you want. watch tv all you like. go to bars. eat ice cream. it's not so bad.
there are 5 stages: pre-contemplative, contemplative, preparation, action and maintenance. which stage are they at? sounds like contemplative. that's why discussing weight-watchers, running, swimming etc is doomed. they're not ready yet.
How about telling them the truth..that you are worried about them. I say that to my friends who drink too much as well as the smokers...I ask them what colour oxygen tank they are gonna have when they get emphysemia or if they will tattoo the scar down their chest when they remove the lump from their lung...or better yet...why not just get one of those sexy trechia holes and I will stick my tongue in it.
Tell them to go on a NO CARB diet, no sugars, just green veggies, salads, 4oz portions of meat, chicken or fish. Lots and lots of water.
You really can't do anything for them UNLESS first they're willing to admit that there is a problem AND are willing to go and get help for it themselves. For them just to say that there is a problem is only half the battle. DON'T goad them, embarrass them or humiliate them in any way if you want to continue being their friend. This may only serve to deepen any insecurity regarding their weight and may cause a resentment towards you.
Best thing you can try is to just sit them down and talk too them about it, tell them how you feel, tell them what you are affraid of and MOST IMPORTANT LISTEN TO THEM. Support them in whatever they decide too do but it has to be their decision. If they actively decide to seek treatment then you may offer some suggestions, go with them to their appointments, show them you care. Support of family and friends is very important.
Any addiction treatment for food, alcohol, drugs, whatever is more successful if the participant actively acknowledges the problem and willfully partakes in any program designed to treat it.
Best thing you can try is to just sit them down and talk too them about it, tell them how you feel, tell them what you are affraid of and MOST IMPORTANT LISTEN TO THEM. Support them in whatever they decide too do but it has to be their decision. If they actively decide to seek treatment then you may offer some suggestions, go with them to their appointments, show them you care. Support of family and friends is very important.
Any addiction treatment for food, alcohol, drugs, whatever is more successful if the participant actively acknowledges the problem and willfully partakes in any program designed to treat it.
what makes you think they care about how you look? are you god's gift to eyesight?I show them my before and after pics...and tell them that I did not diet and just ate differently and started taking better care of myself.
I also tell them that if I can do it...anyone can
if they are active and overweight they obviously are able to function. appearance may be important to you but might not be to everyone. somehow everyone in our society feels the need to tell someone else how they should look and what they should do. Canadians are an incredibly arrogant bunch of pricks.
Have them see their doctor.
The need a referal for Dr Poon, who helps over weight people lose LOTS of weight fast and safe.
It's covered by OHIP.
The need a referal for Dr Poon, who helps over weight people lose LOTS of weight fast and safe.
It's covered by OHIP.
Obesity and being overweight isn't just an issue of appearance, like clothing style, or choice of car... its also unhealthy, regardless of how one feels about themselves
They may be depressed which can cause the problem to get worse... But exercise can get them out of that funk. My advise is to invite them to join you at the gym and make it a habit that they want to continue. The social aspect of it can really get people motivated.
I recently met a friend who worked out five times a week (Chest, Back, Shoulders, Arms and Legs) with a thirty minute cardio afterwards. The workouts only take about an hour each day. He showed me proper form and reps and was motivational without being abusive.
Once I got past one bad bout of soreness, I have been a regular at the gym since and use it as mental and physical therapy The key is to be trained properly... and there are some awful trainers out there who do more harm than good. But I do think that getting them to do anything at the gym with a friends support can be the inspiration they need. I know it got me off the couch! I wish them the best!
I recently met a friend who worked out five times a week (Chest, Back, Shoulders, Arms and Legs) with a thirty minute cardio afterwards. The workouts only take about an hour each day. He showed me proper form and reps and was motivational without being abusive.
Once I got past one bad bout of soreness, I have been a regular at the gym since and use it as mental and physical therapy The key is to be trained properly... and there are some awful trainers out there who do more harm than good. But I do think that getting them to do anything at the gym with a friends support can be the inspiration they need. I know it got me off the couch! I wish them the best!
