wtf emails to escorts

snowleopard

Sexus Perplexus
Feb 15, 2004
2,158
0
0
Wandering the peaks
genintoronto said:
What about Dickheads.blog ? ETA: actually, I vote for snowleopard's suggestion. Much more clever than mine.
Actually Gen, even better, if we combine both of our twisted imaginations we come up with: Hear Ashton's Reviews of Dickheads ...

We would make a great team :p

btw, how you read fucked up email like that and still keep your head straight, is beyond my imagination ... you gals are true bravehearts
 

Ashton.

of Cupids
Oct 23, 2008
575
0
0
Toronto
www.sexyashton.com
Lisa of Toronto said:
you can use this excuse: cuz then you'd get emails from your neighbours:

Want to meet down in the storage room?
I don't generally respond well to stupid questions so I hate emails like this. Clearly my face is hidden to protect my privacy. Big gigantic DUH!!
*Adopting sarcastic voice* But you know what? Maybe he's right. If he can tell exactly what i'm all about and what my personality is like simply from a photo of my face, clearly protecting my privacy is not important. Whatever was I thinking lol?:rolleyes:
 

Sasha Jones

Smart Ass ;-)
Aug 17, 2001
927
0
0
Really Retired.....REALLY!
Awwww all the whackjobs are revealed! LOL

We used to keep the whacked out drunken phone messages we would get at 2 am on friday night and record them to the computer and put them on our website, it was CLASSIC!
But then some dolt figured it was a breach of privacy and staged a protest and we removed them.

It was the best though, especially the first three messages that sparked the idea to put them on our website, where the guy offered to trade us a plow, a coolatron cooler, and some other goodies for some lovin.

God I miss those days sometimes :)
 

Carrie Moon

webstar
Sep 12, 2002
1,426
0
0
Ottawa
www.carriemoon.ultraescort.com
new one today..
I'm not in Toronto anymore as I told him so others may get the same one soon..

I will be in Toronto on the 23 of May to return my ex-girlfriends stuff from Texas. I would like a escort to meet me at the Airport Hilton in the bar from 11:30am to 12:30pm for a drink and drink only. If my ex sees me with another woman she will not try to patch up as I am pretty sure she will try. All you have to do is act like we met last night at the same bar and you spent the night with me. I am 52 years old. Can you handle that?
 

Aardvark154

New member
Jan 19, 2006
53,750
3
0
Carrie Moon said:
new one today..
I'm not in Toronto anymore as I told him so others may get the same one soon..

I will be in Toronto on the 23 of May to return my ex-girlfriends stuff from Texas. I would like a escort to meet me at the Airport Hilton in the bar from 11:30am to 12:30pm for a drink and drink only. If my ex sees me with another woman she will not try to patch up as I am pretty sure she will try. All you have to do is act like we met last night at the same bar and you spent the night with me. I am 52 years old. Can you handle that?
Needless to say I have no "women's intuition" but it sounds just weird enough it may true.
 

Aardvark154

New member
Jan 19, 2006
53,750
3
0
jimmyt said:
Damn, I had no idea you ladies had to deal with this so often...those notes go everywhere from completely funny to completely psychotic.....

Thanks for sharing though!! lol
Too true, and here we thought we were a bit twisted!
 

Carrie Moon

webstar
Sep 12, 2002
1,426
0
0
Ottawa
www.carriemoon.ultraescort.com
Aardvark154 said:
Needless to say I have no "women's intuition" but it sounds just weird enough it may true.
Oh.. I'm sure it's probably real.. it's still a wtf email.
 

whoasweet

New member
Jul 19, 2007
13
0
1
(without using a condom - I am disease free - your co-stars don't wear condoms)
hahah oh wow. way to throw that one in there (no pun intended).
I had a good laugh at that line.
 

whoasweet

New member
Jul 19, 2007
13
0
1
hahahaha pecker. I haven't heard that term used in a while. this blog is a great way to bring it back lol
 

LadyTY2Uall

Sensual Seduction
Feb 1, 2008
3,008
0
0
Whitby
Thanks for the reply, Lady Ty.

As for the challenge, it was my ex who stumbled upon your Craigslist ad and offered to make funds available to me so that I may enjoy a session with you.

Why is my ex paying for this? Well, here is the deal, Lady Ty I am currently practicing male orgasm denial. I actually have a wager with my ex-girlfriend that I can withhold from orgasming for a full year. I made this bet with her at a New Year's Eve party last year based on my theory that men have vastily superior will power versus women when it comes to temptation.

In any event, my ex has agreed to pay for a visit to have fun with someone such as yourself. She's getting desperate -- she's very competitive and doesn't want to lose this bet! Silly girl. For some bizarre reason, she thinks a duo session will "put me over the brink" so to speak.

So, are you up for such a challenge, Lady Ty? Namely, the idea would be for you to make me orgasm while I do everything in my power to withstand your charms (I would look forward to pleasuring you in the process if you so desire.)

Please let me know if you would be agreeable to such a gambit. Given my vastly superior will power, you will, of course, lose the bet (as will my ex.) But at least you may have some fun and make some money to boot.

My thanks in advance,

...........

Excellent. I am so happy both of you are indeed up for the challenge. As hard as it has been for me to remain celibate these past four+ months, my ulitmate reward is watching the helplessness in the woman's eyes when I am able to overcome her teasing secrets. This is ultimatley what makes this worthwhile for me. And the fact that I could have two women defeated this way at once is absolutely enchanting. Just imagine, as one of you stradles my privates and one of you sits upon my face, I'll bring both of you to orgasm while my superior will power triumphs yet again. I can't wait.
............

Hmmm ... your fiesty attitude has me oddly aroused. But you'll find I am a special breed when it comes to retaining. Have you ever had a man resist your teasing secrets before, Lady Ty?

And I am most interested in the positions you and your friend take in a threesome (as this will be my first time.)

As for times, I'm situated during the day out by the airport. Or do you prefer a night time appointment?

And don't feel bad when you fail to make me climax. In fact, you'll enjoy the orgasms I give you (women just can't help themselves in this department.)

All the best,


........
 

Ashton.

of Cupids
Oct 23, 2008
575
0
0
Toronto
www.sexyashton.com
LadyTY2Uall said:
Thanks for the reply, Lady Ty.

As for the challenge, it was my ex who stumbled upon your Craigslist ad and offered to make funds available to me so that I may enjoy a session with you.

Why is my ex paying for this? Well, here is the deal, Lady Ty I am currently practicing male orgasm denial. I actually have a wager with my ex-girlfriend that I can withhold from orgasming for a full year. I made this bet with her at a New Year's Eve party last year based on my theory that men have vastily superior will power versus women when it comes to temptation.

In any event, my ex has agreed to pay for a visit to have fun with someone such as yourself. She's getting desperate -- she's very competitive and doesn't want to lose this bet! Silly girl. For some bizarre reason, she thinks a duo session will "put me over the brink" so to speak.

So, are you up for such a challenge, Lady Ty? Namely, the idea would be for you to make me orgasm while I do everything in my power to withstand your charms (I would look forward to pleasuring you in the process if you so desire.)

Please let me know if you would be agreeable to such a gambit. Given my vastly superior will power, you will, of course, lose the bet (as will my ex.) But at least you may have some fun and make some money to boot.

My thanks in advance,
Hahaha well that is definately a new one... What a tool.
 

Carrie Moon

webstar
Sep 12, 2002
1,426
0
0
Ottawa
www.carriemoon.ultraescort.com
I've had that guy email me too!!!

Dear Carrie:

Here's the situation. Last March, I got into a discussion with my ex-girlfriend that men were sexually superior to women. What I mean by this is that in the process of lovemaking, a man, through sheer willpower, can prevent himself from climaxing whereas a woman would be powerless to do so (be it via oral stimulation or penetration.) A bet was made whether I could "withhold"from climaxing for a year. So far, I have succeeded (although it has been incredibly arduous.) My ex is quite desperate not to lose the bet (she's very competitive) and has even offered to pay the fee of an escort such as yourself. In fact, she was the one who came upon your website and selected you (she knows you are just my type.) She forwarded your website to me.

In any event, would you be up for such a challenge, my dear? I'm definitely up for some fun and can't wait to prove my ex wrong (yet again.)

All the best,
Dave

Then when I said it was a dumb bet but sure I would be happy to take him up on the challenge.. this was the reply

We could always make it more interesting for you. Namely, if you succeed in making me climax, I would pay you twice the fee. How does that sound?

Best regards,
Dave

but of course he never booked... never could figure out the psychology of these guys..
 

BallzDeep

New member
Feb 12, 2007
2,265
5
0
Ashton. said:
Hahaha well that is definately a new one... What a tool.
I don't find it all that unusual, not real creepy, as long as he pays and doesn't stay extra time, to me it would be a usual session, if he doesn't cum, so what, he's paid and is on his way and him and his ex can argue over it.
 

Ashton.

of Cupids
Oct 23, 2008
575
0
0
Toronto
www.sexyashton.com
BallzDeep said:
I don't find it all that unusual, not real creepy, as long as he pays and doesn't stay extra time, to me it would be a usual session, if he doesn't cum, so what, he's paid and is on his way and him and his ex can argue over it.
Haha it's not that part that annoys me. It's the men having stronger will powers than women part lol. Women would be powerless to not orgasm and all that lol.
 

Aardvark154

New member
Jan 19, 2006
53,750
3
0
Carrie Moon said:
Oh.. I'm sure it's probably real.. it's still a wtf email.
Doubtless men and women think about this differently. As a man, Toby Keith's "How do you like me now?" comes to mind.

I think some of us have done it the "real way" and then there are the posers, but I'm willing to bet that the emotions are rather the same.
 

BallzDeep

New member
Feb 12, 2007
2,265
5
0
Ashton. said:
Haha it's not that part that annoys me. It's the men having stronger will powers than women part lol. Women would be powerless to not orgasm and all that lol.
Ignore that shit and take his money, make him cum in about 5 minutes and laugh at him.;)
 
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