my gf is currently at a mere 155. majority of her weight is on her belly now and her legs. what concerns me is the fat she has around her belly and what i have read about it (how dangerous it can be etc).
the reason for my post was to ask for advice and see what ppl might have to say. to me looks are not everything, if it was the case, i wouldve left this girl already. nor have i asked her before to just workout and slim down. i have always asked her to excel is everything, from work to workout! i have never compared her to another women, but in her eyes, when she sees another women she wants to be like her, and thus my name is thrown in the mix "you want me to look like that you moron!" it's stupidness like that drives me crazy. it's gotten to a point where i can no longer go to a mall or anywhere where women are lol, and not get bitched at or hear complains how she is this and that!!! i personally like to think i can tolerate and have high endurance to b.s. but to cut the chase short, it's getting over played and retarted.
some ppl said, there are reasons why she gained weight, well if events did occur, i dont think it should dictate a persons life - regardless, the world moves on and so should you, and no if she claims depression, im just gonna slap her b.c lol thats retarted...
again, what upsets me is the fact that she compares herself to a healthy women, and just throws my name in the mix and im the bad guy for asking her to look fit/healthy. its sad b.c i really like the girl, but i cant simply stand her attitude now. she tells me infront of family she wants to lose weight and to tell her when she doesnt eat well. well, when she is eating cupcakes, or going out and eating the unneccessary cheese, pasta etc, i get ticked off and i let her know, mind you in a nice way - that it's against what she should eat. she gives me the stare and asks me "which girl are you comparing me to now in this place" LMAO. at that point, i dont know if i should just laugh and ignore (which i tend to do) or start crying b.c i dont know what's casuing this lol.
it's sad when you hear her younger cousin saying she's fat now and im just sitting there "yeah, she's trying to do something" when clearly i dont see much action, more talk. it's moments like these that really want me to question, why!
i dont mean to come here and rant and find a solution, but rather, why she is acting the way she is. she was not like this before. yeah the weight gain has been a big issue and ppl have said it to her (not just me) and have bought up the subject, but i dont see her doing the neccessary steps. it's really sad! i told her i'd be with her for the good and bad, and i guess this is the bad/ugly and im still there, but she has to do something in return. when i dont see her gym for a couple weeks, but have the peace of mind to watch tyra banks or eat that extra cupcake (that i asked her to make for me lol), i dont know what she is doing - fooling me or herself, and for how long?
our goal is to get slim or healthy by the mid june, but at this rate i dont see it happening. i have seen her workout at the gym before, and i didn't come out impressed, and i tell her, work out with me and we'll be good, but she doesnt listen and complains bout childish things - how can i change her mind on that?
the thing is, i can pack my bags and dip, but i just cant do that. i think it's unfair to her and me - b.c im giving up and im not that type of person. but i just get frustrated with her comments and behaviour. i finally told her yest night - you compare urself to those women and tag myself, if you are going to, then do something about it instead of sitting here and bitching. i dont know how clear my talk is to her, but clearly i dont know what to do if i dont see results in a few weeks.
ive told her to set goals for herself, but she brings her in work schedule and randomness and ignores the gym, when really she shouldn't be. she took the past week off to recover for some long/hectic days and work, but no gym. i gave a few days for her rest, but at mid week, she was just lounging at home, doing jack (except prob gaining weight). that really gets me going.
i dont know how to tell her to be serious or get cracking on this b.c it can get bad for her, and potentially if she has any kids with or w.o me. you know what i mean. i'm just worried that is why im here writing this much. i can cut of her off, bc that's giving up on life again and i cant do that. i just need some sign from her or some motivational advice lol to get her really going with this weight loss issue.
